BP’s Long-Term Game Plan: More PR, and a Flotilla of Lobbyists

By: Thursday June 3, 2010 3:30 pm

Tony Hayward, when he’s not sticking his foot in his mouth, has devised a great idea to put BP back on top — an ad campaign.

BP’s Hayward Apologizes, Realizes America Wants 11 Lives and Our Gulf Back

By: Thursday June 3, 2010 6:01 am

BP’s CEO Hayward apologizes for his remark, “I want my life back.”

BP CEO: Sickened Cleanup Workers Probably Have Food Poisoning

By: Monday May 31, 2010 11:55 am

At least nine fishermen hired by BP to use their boats to help with oil cleanup in the Gulf of Mexico have been hospitalized with serious heath problems, including one who “busted his skull” after collapsing on a dock.

When asked about this clear pattern of illnesses of workers who come in contact BP’s oil and chemical dispersants, BP CEO Tony Hayward callously dismissed the health problems as “food poisoning.”

Well Temporarily Plugged, But Giant Underwater Plumes Remain

By: Friday May 28, 2010 9:45 am

BP’s CEO Tony Hayward finally admitted the oil spill represents “an environmental catastrophe,” and President Obama is headed for the Gulf today.

“Very, Very, Modest” Impact? How About Twenty-four Miles of Dead Marsh, Mr. Hayward?

By: Friday May 21, 2010 4:35 pm

Despite claims by BP CEO Tony Hayward that the environmental impact of the BP oil spill will be “very, very modest”, the true magnitude of the destruction is now being seen, as a marsh with a twenty-four mile shoreline in Plaquemines Parish, Louisiana.

Look at All the Ocean That’s NOT Polluted! Why Must You Be So Negative???

By: Friday May 14, 2010 10:03 am

BP CEO Tony Hayward has come up with a truly awesome explanation of why the Deep Horizon disaster really isn’t so bad after all. Of course one of the next logical steps will be to use this as a defense for murder.

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