According to “one of America’s fastest rising authors” (it says so right here and it is on the internet so it must be true) it seems that President Hussein Obamar has been using Black Panther beat-down threats or maybe even Kenyan magic juju to enslave most of the Supreme Court so that they won’t declare him a foreign usurper and therefore rule his presidency null and void, tap tap no erasies.

I’m just spit-balling here but, according to an old IRS schedule I found under my desk along with some fancy guesstimating taking into account the longitude and latitude of Ft. Knox times The Number of The Beast divided by the current price of the Rooty Tooty Fresh ‘N Fruity® at IHOP, Warren Buffet’s secretary must make like a hundred bajillion dollars and change per year.

Well over two years ago the Obama’s threw a Halloween party at the White House for children of military members and their families, that coincided with the release of Tim Burton’s Alice In Wonderland movie. Burton, Johnny Depp and other cast members attended, with Burton supplying props and decorations from the film. This was, of course, a very lovely, and I’m sure thrilling, thing to do for the military kids on Halloween. Unfortunately, the White House failed to capitalize on their, and the Alice people’s, graciousness in hosting the party by promoting it far and wide and now…

In Thomas Frank’s excellent new book Pity The Billionaire, he explains that The Right had to subvert reality, which we all know has a distinct liberal bias, and pin the blame for the on-going financial crisis on liberals instead of the conservative’s “the invisible hand whispered in my ear that financial regulations are tyranny, so stop it, you guys” economic policies. But how to do that? Why by complaining that the Right is nothing but a bunch of cleverly-inserted by sleeper liberals (I blame The Democrat Machine)

But plucky Bill Hemrick is not one to be denied a voice in determining the future course of The American Experiment, so he and some buddies all pitched in to start up Tea Party HD which was supposed to be a teevee network devoted to teabaggers that would, I don’t know, maybe have a camera mounted on everyone’s flatscreen and people could sit on their couches and watch themselves scream . . .