Buy Nothing Day (via: Alisa Bertucci)

Today, Friday, 134 million American lemmings with credit cards will clog roads, parking lots, and cash registers, scurrying and reaching and inching along together to take hold of dead stuff. Then they’ll all reverse course, burning yet more carbon to drag the dead objects home with them. Most of the objects that they’ll burn lots of carbon to acquire travelled to America in huge ships burning lots of carbon (and toxic bunker fuel): manufacturing these objects burnt more carbon.

How else can we spend this Friday?

How did 43% of America’s population end up doing synchronized Anthropocene fire dances on a dangeously warming planet?

The usual suspects: Freud’s nephew and the Philadelphia Police Department.

Freud’s nephew, Eddie Bernays, broke the Sense Barrier: he figured out how to use our feelings to trick us into ignoring our common sense, largely creating modern advertising, PR, and propaganda at the same time. Over the last couple of decades, Bernays’s understudies in propaganda with channels TV began to show us pictures of long lines of shoppers in November. Good lemmings and primates that we are, we keep turning to join the lines we’ve seen. All these lem-people wouldn’t keep lining up there without getting rewarded, right?

When America lines up for Black Friday’s carbon dance, how come the Philadelphia Police Department gets to call the steps? Simple: they proved they’re the go-to guys in burning down the house around us – kids and all. Hell, they’re the go-to guys in burning down the whole damn block around us. Who better to block out the action for America’s annual fire dance on our roasting planet? Philly’s PD has history on their side, too. They’ve been calling shoppers’ tune since shortly after Dick Clark moved his Bandstand from Philly to Hollywood. Bonnie Taylor-Blake from the American Dialect Society discovered:

The earliest known reference to “Black Friday” (in this sense)… refers to Black Friday 1965 and makes the Philadelphia origin explicit:

JANUARY 1966 — “Black Friday” is the name which the Philadelphia Police Department has given to the Friday following Thanksgiving Day. It is not a term of endearment to them. “Black Friday” officially opens the Christmas shopping season in center city, and it usually brings massive traffic jams and over-crowded sidewalks as the downtown stores are mobbed from opening to closing.^{[1] [h/t wiki]}

Without Black Friday, who’d be following in Philly’s footsteps this week? Definitely not Ted Dave – the Vancouver artist who founded Buy Nothing Day. Definitely not Kalle Lasn and the other Adbusters magazine folk who made Buy Nothing Day a global celebration. And most defintely not the folks around the planet who’ll be celebrating Buy Nothing Day this Friday in North America and this Saturday in the rest of world.

Why let the other lemmings people have all the fun? You can celebrate Buy Nothing Day, too: share the day with folks you love at home – or go out and meet new friends at Buy Nothing Day events. You can even celebrate Buy Nothing Day at your local mall – and get a second chance at Halloween!

Zombie Walk: Participant ‘zombies’ wander around shopping malls or other consumer havens with a blank stare and marvel at the expressionless faces of the shoppers (their fellow zombies).

Or this Friday you too can join 134 million walking dead, burning more carbon to bring home more dead stuff on our roasting planet. After all, how you go wrong imitating the Philadelphia Police Department?

Happy Thanksgiving! Happy Buy Nothing Day!

Is Tucker Carlson crossing his  legs?

Amazingly, Rush Limbaugh describes how to organize the inventory (my bold, no link — are you kidding?):

Fine, Madam Speaker, you go first. Let’s inventory every aspect of your life, Nancy, all of it. How many times do you flush a day? How much do you eat? What do you eat? How many prescription drugs do you take? How many houses do you have? What’s your electric bill?

The projection astounds.

Missing from Chuck Devore’s ad, of course, is that Nancy Pelosi was speaking in China to Chinese students — and that her "inventory" suggestion isn’t about government intervention. It is about personal responsibility. But what’s the tie-in to Barbara Boxer? Does Chuck Devore plan to run against Barbara Boxer by talking about Nancy Pelosi?

Is his campaign centered on the message "Have you ever seen them together in the same room? Huh? Have you?"

Oh, and scary bossy lady overseers coming for your pickup truck.

My better half and I joined at least 2500 other Sonoma County citizens standing against bigotry and hate today, at the Santa Rosa Join the Impact event. A peaceful crowd filled at least seven blocks, and threaded its way to City Hall, where drummers beat out a tattoo, a brass band played and passing cars honked out support. The just-married and the long-married, families of all sizes, kinds and ages, a small herd of Australian shepherds and a basset announcing his opposition to h8 joined together on this beautiful day to re-affirm our commitment to social equality. A good day.

(Cross-posted at JustPeaceNow)

OK, so this is Norm Coleman’s (R-MN) latest anti-Al Franken ad

And this is the source of that footage (both h/t Americablog)

Nice. I guess trashing Wellstone’s friends and family for remembering him worked out well enough for Coleman last time he thought he’d try it again.

In the mean time, the National Republican Senatorial Committee is running their own, in its own way equally bizarre, anti-Al Franken ad in Minnesota. Join me, won’t you?

OK, I’ll confess. I’m a little confused. Norm Coleman was elected because George W. Bush poured money into his state, and because Paul Wellstone died. Coleman st00d bravely behind his lock-step support of his increasingly unpopular party right up to the point where it became clear that loyalty would hurt him, and then (looking at the polls) he told his local public radio station that he would have skipped the Republican Convention if he hadn’t lobbied to hard to bring it to his state (he also objected to the Palin pick). He and his wife (BLO & GO entrepreneur and amateur lingerie model Laurie) have some legal issues.

So whose celebrity endorsement is going to turn it around for Norm Coleman?

Well, there’s Robert Davi, a guy who’s best known for playing criminals and terrorists (which, obviously, says nothing about his real-life character, but it’s got to be unhelpful with the audience they’re clearly trying to speak to here)

Stephen "the Baldwin who’s best known for being related to Alex, except for the hanging outside a porn store in Nyack with a camera thing and the Pauly Shore movie" Baldwin, who wants to "slap Obama around" (although if Obama wins, he’s bailing)

A woman who became a minor celebrity standing on her head in a leotard who was last seen playing Andrew Dice Clay’s girlfriend in a socially responsible film called Casual Sex (quote: "I don’t want a political label, but Obama bears traits that resemble the anti-Christ and I’m scared to death that un-educated people will ignorantly vote him into office.")

The guy who played America’s favorite ignorant socially-retarded bar rat

And Pat "dood. You’re kidding, right? Pat Boone? In a bathing suit?" Boone.

The beauty part of this, for a New Yorker, anyway, is that with Coleman’s best shot at re-election in mind, Coleman’s campaign and the NRSC chose to highlight his political credibility and popular appeal by featuring this gold-plated cast of political heavy hitters instead of the Giuliani endorsement.

You know, except for the part where it’s like watching gangrene crawl up your arm, I’m really enjoying this political cycle.

I can has election? Please?

All of the weeks of petty, inaccurate crapola from McCain, the smear merchantry behind the whispers and e-mails, the attempts to convince the doubters among us that "Obama is foreign" to give cover for racial prejudice as a means of urging folks to vote the worst in themselves?

"Suggesting Obama is foreign or unknown offers a cover for racism," she said. "You can’t say he is black and unfit to be president, but you can say that he is Muslim and therefore unfit to be president."

Contrary to what the smears have pushed about Obama, it is those self-same tactics which have been so unforgivably unAmerican. Which call out to the worst of what is in us, and deliberately stoke the prejudices and hatred in our society to further divide the nation. Why? Because the GOP cannot win on its tired, failed ideas in another round of retread politics.

Instead of coming up with better solutions to long-standing problems?  They preferred to fling poo.  

Divisive and bitterly damaging — perhaps McCain has nothing else. His well has been dry for a long, long time. As has the Republican party, which has been running on the fumes of fear and smear for far too long.

Take a little time to watch the full Obama ad from last night (YouTube above), and then watch this from McCain (YouTube below).

You tell me: which one looks like a leader? And which one just looks like a petty, bitter, small man resorting to "terrah terrah boogah ahhhhhhhhhh!!!!!" tactics that ask you not to think for yourself but only fear and smear.

Although McCain was not seen during the half-hour, one could easily summon the contrasting image of the Republican while watching Obama. McCain has come across on television as relatively worried, whiny, fusty and falsely folksy. He brought bad news; he has come to epitomize and personify it. Obama brings you medication along with the list of symptoms; he has developed a great bedside, as well as fireside, manner.

Ouch. I guess America isn’t ready for a ICU visit from Dr. Krauthammer.

But fear not, John McCain, David Broder still hopes to share a Werther’s Original and a loving, short-armed embrace:

The campaign has been costly in terms of McCain’s reputation. He has been condemned for small-minded partisanship, not praised for his generous and important suggestion that the major-party candidates stump the country together, conducting weekly joint town hall meetings — an innovation Obama turned down.

Because nothing is more mavericky than wanting to have your ass-kicked by your much younger, yet more mature opponent, ten times instead of three.

That’s sado-masochism you can believe in, my friends…well, that and Matlock.

(pic from captainhitsugaya)

Life imitates art, I guess. Here’s a transcript of a Saturday Night Live sketch from the 1990s featuring Al Franken as a political analyst discussing negative ads on the fake news broadcast "Weekend Update with Norm MacDonald":

Al Franken: Uh, yes, Norm. This appears to be the roughest campaign year ever.

Norm MacDonald: Negative campaigning?

Al Franken: Oh, yeah. Yeah. I’ve been covering politics for a long time and this is, without a doubt, the most mean-spirited year I’ve ever seen. Now, take for example, Massachusetts [scattered applause] where Senate challenger Mitt Romney is spending millions of dollars on attack ads like this one. Watch.

[Dissolve to ad with photo of a ruddy-faced Ted Kennedy accompanied by minor key music and a deep-throated, smarmy announcer's voice over.]

Announcer V/O: On October 14th, 1978, Ted Kennedy is seen puking in the parking lot of the U.S. Capitol. … On February 8th, 1983, Kennedy relieves himself on the leg of a Georgetown waitress. … Two years later, Kennedy passes out on the floor of the Senate, soiling himself in the process. … Kennedy — He’s a big, fat drunk. …

[Cheers and applause as we dissolve back to Al and Norm at the desk.]

Norm MacDonald: Yeah. Yeah, that was tough.

Al Franken: It’s a tough year. Tough year. … And it’s really become a no-holds barred contest. Uh, watch this. This is one of Kennedy’s attack ads on Romney.

[Dissolve to another ad with minor key music and a deep-throated, smarmy announcer's voice over.]

Announcer V/O: [Image of Brigham Young] Mormon prophet Brigham Young believed that a man ought to have as many wives as he wants. Apparently, Mitt Romney agrees. [Side by side images of Young and Romney] After all, he’s a Mormon. [Upbeat trumpet fanfare as we dissolve to a photo of Mr. and Mrs. Ted Kennedy.] Ted Kennedy — One Wife at a Time. …

[Cheers and applause as we dissolve back to Al and Norm at the desk.]

Norm MacDonald: Okay, so Massachusetts, then, is the nation’s dirtiest race.

Al Franken: Oh, no. No, uh, I want you to watch this one. It’s a Huffington ad run in California and the key here is that this is run only on Christian cable stations. Watch this.

[Dissolve to a third ad with photo of Diane Feinstein accompanied by even darker minor key music and an even more snide announcer's voice over.]

Announcer V/O: Diane Feinstein is against prayer in school. And no wonder. She’s a Jew. …

[Dissolve back to Al and Norm at the desk, both shaking their heads.]

Norm MacDonald: Man, that was – that – that was ugly. …

Al Franken: It was ugly. It’s an ugly year. …

Norm MacDonald: Well, that has to be the most unprincipled ad in the country.

Al Franken: You know, that’s what I thought, Norm … I saw this Pataki ad run right here in New York, an attack ad on Governor Cuomo. Let’s watch this.

[Dissolve to a fourth ad, similar to the others, with a photo of Mario Cuomo.]

Announcer V/O: Mario Cuomo says he’s tough on crime. But what Mario Cuomo will not tell you is that in 1968, he was involved in a chainsaw massacre. … [Footage of a chain saw being switched on and someone brutally thrusting the chainsaw into a man's crotch] Cuomo — He’s a Murderer. …

[Cheers and applause as we dissolve back to Al and a stunned Norm.]

Al Franken: That’s – That’s a negative ad. …

Norm MacDonald: Man, well, at least, that’s, uh, that’s the worst one.

Al Franken: Yeah, but, uh, remember, Norm, there’s still two and a half weeks left in the campaign. [grins broadly]

Norm MacDonald: Thanks, Al. Al Franken, ladies and gentlemen! [Cheers and applause, Norm shakes hands with Al]

Ralph Stanley sounds cuter than a speckled pup under a red wagon.  Just listen.

Folks here in WV, and also KY, PA, OH, TN, NC, MD, and VA would connect with this.  Because Ralph Stanley isn’t just a bluegrass legend, he sounds like "one of us."

How important is that in this region? I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I actually agree with something Mudcat Saunders said. (Even a blind hog finds an acorn once in a while…just ignore the hanging dead animals on his walls. Please.)

The Democrats don’t come here [to rural America] and campaign, because they don’t think they can win here. The Republicans don’t come here and campaign because they take the votes for granted on cultural issues. What happens is there’s no debate over rural America, and who gets hurt? Rural America….

Folks are feeling a whole lot of hurt right now.  A lot of them who were Bush supporters the last time around are thinking about voting for Obama.  But Obama needs to close the deal.  

What most folks around here want to know is two things: (1) Are you one of us? and (2) Are our issues and concerns important to you?  We run on retail politics, and that means shaking hands and looking folks in the eye so they can take your measure. But a good surrogate can work wonders, and that Ralph Stanley ad is brilliant.

On the issues? The Charleston Gazette, WV’s largest paper, just endorsed Obama.  Plus, WaPo/ABC has Obama leading in Ohio – and NC and VA are tilting blue as well.  Git that Stanley ad on the radio!

(YouTube — Ralph Stanley picking The Clinch Mountain Backstep.)

1982. John McCain goes to Washington. Things have changed in the last 26 years. But McCain hasn’t. 

He admits he still doesn’t know how to use a computer, can’t send an email.

Still doesn’t understand the economy. And favors two hundred billion in new tax cuts for corporations, but almost nothing for the middle class.

After one President who was out of touch…We just can’t afford more of the same.

For the disco ball and McCain with sideburn-ish hairiness pictures alone, this one is worth the watch. But when you get to his slick-assed grin while standing by George W. Bush at the end? That says it all.

His badly vetted Veep selection keeps flaunting her shallow depths in public: Iraq was part of the 9/11 attacks? Discredited ages ago, dear. Doesn’t know what preemptive doctrine is? Yep, there’s a finger I want on the nuclear button.   So the ad has a double whammy of hitting McCain in his cluelessness and his lengthy time inside the Beltway, at a time when his "fresh face" is looking not so fresh. Yowza!

Credit where credit is due:  Rahm Emmanuel said on a call this morning that with McCain/Palin, you get the economic policies of Bush and the foreign policies of Cheney.   Ugh.  More of the same in an even less-appetizing package.  Who would have thought that possible?

The second ad is Obama, looking directly into the camera, and speaking to the American people, rebutting the GOP whisper campaign head-on. And I think it may be the more effective of the two — see what you think:

We’ve heard a lot of talk about change this year. The question is, change to what?

To me, change is a government that doesn’t let banks and oil companies rip off the American people.

Change is when we finally fix health care instead of just talking about it.

Change is giving tax breaks to middle class families instead of companies that send jobs overseas.

Change is a president who brings people together.

I’m Barack Obama, and I approved this message because this year, change has to be more than a slogan.

So, what do you all think? What works and what doesn’t for you?

Out-of-context snippets.

Andrea Mitchell: "That literally is not true."

Joe Klein: "…Senator Honor’s daily lies and bilge–his constant attempts to divert attention from substantive issues…"

Jonathan Martin: "factually shaky"

Joe Garofoli: "Now McCain is lying about Factcheck.org."

Newsweek: "why kick off your campaign with an ad that’s full of falsehoods?"

John Sidney McCain III is not running an honorable campaign. It’s an unpatriotic campaign. It’s a dishonest campaign. Every ad his campaign has put on the air since his convention has been untrue. The campaign is full of untruths, distortions, and lies. He knows he can’t win a campaign based on the truth, so he lies to the American people to win.

Haven’t we had enough lies? Haven’t we had enough?

Have you had enough?

{YouTube from BraveNewFilms. Please share it widely.}