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January 21, 2007

Face the Snark

Posted in: Uncategorized

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for the week ending 1/20/07:

National Sanctity of Human Life Day, 2007
A Proclamation by the President of the United States of America

National Sanctity of Human Life Day serves as a reminder that we must value human life in all forms, not just those considered healthy, wanted, or convenient. Together, we can work toward a day when the dignity and humanity of every person is respected.

NOW, THEREFORE, I, GEORGE W. BUSH, President of the United States of America, by virtue of the authority vested in me by the Constitution and laws of the United States, do hereby proclaim Sunday, January 21, 2007, as National Sanctity of Human Life Day. I call upon all Americans to recognize this day with appropriate ceremonies and to underscore our commitment to respecting and protecting the life and dignity of every human being.

So sayeth the President who turned the Hurricane Katrina disaster into an almost incomprehensibly criminal case of political whitewashing, is pursuing a state of war in perpetuity, has systematically gutted funding for cancer research, has actively ignored calls for universal health care, has appointed misogynistic Creationists to prominent positions at Health and Human Services, has done next to nothing to stop the genocide in Darfur…should I keep going?  Oh, the stoooopid, it BUUUUURRRRRRRNS with the fires of a thousand suns!

Ach, who am I kidding?  This is, as The Rude Pundit notes, just another example of Bush's addiction to pandering to the Right:

Do you think the White House even gives a shit that it's beyond ironic and somewhere down the short road to demented to declare Sunday "National Sanctity of Human Life Day," that yearly tradition that celebrates fetuses in all their gooey glory? Do you think that they even recognize that, if you unilaterally start a war and refuse to end that war even as you cause death, destruction, and misery of amazing proportions to pregnant and non-enfetused women, you don't get to say that you declare a day that is "a reminder that we must value human life in all forms, not just those considered healthy, wanted, or convenient"?

And what with the State of the Union address in a scant two days' time, I hope you're all on the edge of your seats, eager for more of this sort of hypocritical, cynical crap — I'm especially looking forward to Bush's twisted logic on raising taxes for employees whose bad luck it is to have health insurance plans. Oh, there'll probably be more switchgrass/biofuels talk, fearmongering of the legendary hybrid "Manimal," and, of course, MARS, BITCHES! 

Any speculations on what else Bush will try to scam the American people with this year? 

Now go out there and celebrate National Misogyny Day! 

Best of Both Worlds' P O'Neill is making my brain hurt with these cognitively dissonant Presidential proclamations. Speaking of suffering from irony deficiency, Ana Marie Cox is once again fueling the misconception that she has something important to contribute to the national discourse, according to Whiskey Fire's Thers.

Steve M. at No More Mister Nice Blog critiques Peggy "Honey, look! Dolphins!" Noonan's hankie-twisting prelude to the SOTU.

Attaturk at Rising Hegemon goes to town on the $13.7 billion U.S.S. Gerald Ford/Friends of Cheney project. 

Kung Fu Monkey's Rogers and Maru the Crankpot at WTF is it Now? gloat over Abu Gonzales' manhandling by the Senate Judiciary. And why the hell not?  Have you seen the latest Gitmo trial training manual?  Brad Altrocket at Sadly, No! has a few choice words for it.  Holden at First Draft notes that Gonzales missed a seat at the Algonquin Round Table by thiiiiiiiis much.

Scott at World O' Crap takes another 2 x 4 to Dinesh D'Souza's lastest logic-depleted screed, while Roger Ailes piles on.  TBogg enjoys pureeing the fruits of D'Souza's labors.  Oh, and unless you're the Duggars, why the hell do you need 7.5 bathrooms in one house?  Then again, Dinesh denies the existence of the leopard-print rug. in his living room.  So sayeth Jesus' General, anyway.

Commandante Agi at This Blog Will Self-Destruct in Five Seconds introduces us to the latest Rove product roll-out.  Mmmmm-mmm, that's good kool-aid! 

Mock, Paper, Scissors' Tengrain grumbles about George Bush's fumbles.

The Rude Pundit cockpunches Glenn Beck.  Repeatedly.  And Shakespeare's Sister suggests that perhaps all of this pundit victimization would be a great idea for the Olympics.

Creature at State of the Day has to calm down the wife every time whenever the Idiot King appears on their television.

Skippy the Bush Kangaroo's Mimus Pauly sums up quite neatly the exasperation I know I'm feeling at all this "Democratic Hat-Tossing" bullshit.

Princess Sparkle Pony keeps us up to date on Condi's swingin' time in London. 


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