Democratic Governors, This Is Not Helpful

While the Democratic party is working overtime to brand prospective GOP presidential nominee John McCain as a corrupt Washington insider in bed with lobbyists, who wants our troops in Iraq for one hundred years and who can’t even follow the campaign law with his own name on it, Democratic governors need to think fast when Dan Balz calls. He’s the lead political writer for the Washington forking Post. When a Democratic governor says nice things about John McCain, it’s gonna end up in the forking paper.

Please get with the program, Democratic Governors, in order to avoid future headlines like today’s gem: "Democratic Governors See McCain As Formidable." The only possible headlines we want from interviews with you are "Democratic Governors See McCain As Dangerous" and "Democratic Governors See McCain As Corrupt" and "Democratic Governors See McCain As Out Of Touch With American Values."

When Balz calls for a quote about Senator Straight-Talk, please avoid using the word APPEAL. Otherwise, we get quotes like these in the neo-con Potomac Pravda:

"He is appealing in Michigan," said Gov. Jennifer Granholm, who supports Clinton. "He does appeal to independent thinkers, at least he did in the past, and we have a lot of those in Michigan…."

… and…

"I think John McCain could have an appeal to a lot of Ohioans," said Gov. Ted Strickland, a Clinton supporter.

When Balz calls for a quote, please avoid using the word IDEAL. Otherwise, we get quotes like this:

"In some ways," said Gov. Edward G. Rendell of Pennsylvania, a state that is considered a must-win for any Democratic nominee, "he’s the ideal [Republican] candidate for Pennsylvania."

Finally, do not tell the biographical story of John McCain as John McCain wants it told. Don’t talk about the war hero who spent five years in the Hanoi Hilton as a prisoner of war. Otherwise, you’ll end up with quotes like this:

Maryland Gov. Martin O’Malley, a Clinton supporter, said McCain’s biography — which includes more than five years in a North Vietnamese prison camp — makes him "a formidable challenge" in the fall campaign.

The John McCain biography Democrats want to focus on is the candidate whose campaign is infested with lobbyists. The candidate whose Straight Talk is really just more Double Talk. The candidate who wants to send every American’s grandkids’ grandkids to Iraq. The candidate who can’t follow the campaign finance law with his own forking name on it. The candidate who guarantees America Four More Years of BushCheneyCo corruption and cronyism.

Not "appealing." Not "formidable." Not "ideal." None of these words should escape your lips when discussing John McCain. Ever. Especially when Balz calls. Because it will end up in the Washington Post. Which it did.

This is non-complex, Democratic governors. Please make it your job not to be quoted this way again. Thank you.

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