We Don’t Make Up This Stuff
Posted in: 2008 Election, Economics, Republicans, St. John McCain
7:52 pm ET:
As Attaturk noted in the last thread, MSNBC’s election crew of Pat Buchanan and Joe Scarborough, the 2nd best political team on television (Blitzer says CNN is 1st), are on to something. They’ve simplified the McCain campaign slogan as "less jobs and more wars." That sounds like a winner in the Republican Party, given their continued support for George Bush (66 percent in Florida, according to exit polls).
However, Mitt "Chameleon" Romney has shown himself to be infinitely adaptable. I’m expecting him to tout his business experience and come out with something like, "once I’m CEO, there will be even more layoffs, and even more Islamo-fascist wars." It will be a tough choice for Republicans.
Rudy Guiliani told us last night that "I never back down from a fight." He said that after declining to engage in the contests in Iowa, New Hampshire, Montana, Nevada and South Carolina and then quitting before Super Tuesday.
Rudy also said "we ran a campaign that was uplifting," which Joe Biden once translated as "a noun, a verb, and 9/11." Rudy then vowed he’d help "win the terrorists war on us." The best thing he can do to keep American safe is not become President. Bye, bye, Rudy, and thanks for the simplified tax form.
Mitt Romney said last night that "before kids have babies, they should get married." I should write that down so I don’t forget. Unfortunately, Mitt’s speech rudely cut off Mike Huckabee’s concession, so we don’t know whether Huck will put that idea in the Constitution after he becomes St. McCain’s running mate.
Mitt also said that "all the politicians in Washington should be replaced with real people." Apparently, we will not have a Congress under a Romney Administration, following the precedent pursued by the Bush Administration. However, this confirms what I’ve alway suspected: some of those Republicans are probably pod people. The nation is saved.
Breaking: World War III option preserved!
White House officials expressed anger on Tuesday about an appearance in which the United States ambassador to the United Nations, Zalmay Khalilzad, sat beside the Iranian foreign minister at a panel of the World Economic Forum in Davos, Switzerland, on Saturday.
Don’t worry. The story explains they didn’t talk to each other or shake hands.
Related posts:
Return to: We Don’t Make Up This Stuff
Social Web