Late Night: Wingnut Crap of the Week

Obama takes South Carolina. But in the larger sense, who is the winner here? Me, obviously, because that makes this Red State post funny:

As in all Democratic primaries, I’m rooting for injuries. In this case, that means rooting for Hillary Clinton. Can you imagine the delicious schadenfreude if the polls yet again consistently show Obama with a comfortable lead, and yet when the Democratic voters go into the booth in private, they yet again pull the lever for the white folks?

I’m rooting for Clinton *hard* in this one, folks.

Root harder next time. Use more Jergens, perhaps.

Which is not to say that you can’t learn a lot from the Red State gang on the subject of polling. For instance, this fellow informs us that John McCain’s startling ability to come across as less bugshit crazy than the other GOP clown-car candidates proves that even though everybody hates the war, everybody… really loves the war. It’s a very clever argument whose only flaw is that it is deeply stupid. But then again, as this person informs us, it’s all the Liberal Media’s fault that when everyone else sees an ass, Red State asses clearly perceive an elbow. For, after all,

The liberal line blares from every pore in the media.

Which is not so much a mixed metaphor, but rather a metaphor that his been brutally murdered and stuffed headfirst into the wood-chipper. Some of us still speak English here in the U-Nited States, buster.

Which brings us to the really BIG breaking news from Greater Wingnuttia this week, news that will SHOCK and AMAZE you — yes, even you, you cynical moonbat you, who perhaps believe that you have already seen the Right Blogosphere say and believe everything:

Michelle Malkin believes that John McCain is being financed by George Soros.

Dear friends, if I could make this sort of stuff up, I would, but it exceeds my poor powers of invention.

To be fair, though, I’m also baffled by the Democratic leadership in the House and Senate. Here’s an interesting tit-bit from the latest NBC/WSJ poll:

Who do you want to see take the lead role in setting policy for the country: George W. Bush or the Congress?

Bush: 21

Congress: 68

You ever get the feeling you’re a totally open wide receiver in the end zone, and you’re looking at your quarterback, and he’s like, just beating off or something?

Throw the fucking ball, Harry, would ya?

Related posts:

1. On “This Week,” Paul Krugman Dispatches 3 Wingnut Talking Points on Auto Industry in 2 Minutes
2. Late Night: This Week In Obama Killing Your Grandma…
3. Late Night: The Wacky World of Wingnut Funny
4. Late Night: The Babble Phlegm of the Wingnut Republic; OR, What’s a Half a Million or So, Give or Take?
5. Late Night: Right and Wrong Do Kinda Exist, Y’Know…