I will never understand why the greatest defenders of American Christianity seem to need to think that all Christians secretly want to behave like total assholes:

“Anti-bullying legislation is exactly the same,” Mr. Fischer said. “It’s just another thinly veiled attempt to promote the homosexual agenda. No one is in favor of anyone getting bullied for any reason, but these anti-bullying policies become a mechanism for punishing Christian students who believe that homosexual behavior is not something that should be normalized.”

Fischer is complaining about schools encouraging students to “Mix It Up” by sitting with different kids during lunch periods. I remember my first same-sex french-fry encounter, and it changed me forever. He’s absolutely right to guard against such temptations among our impressionable youth.

Seriously, though, what is wrong with these people that they think all Christians really want the biggest opportunity to be bullies and dicks? Fischer is fighting for your right to tell people they’re living their lives in contravention to God’s will and are probably going to burn in hell for it? Is that what he thinks most Christians should walk around saying to one another? Is that the highest expression of Christianity to which he can imagine aspiring, such that it must be protected so fiercely in math class and now in the lunch room?

It’s not exactly a compliment to his fellow Christians, that this is what he thinks they want.

A.