Hell, for all I know they’ve embedded a tiny microchip on the front page of every dead-tree edition, too, like those annoying Hallmark cards that sing at you. Set your paper on the kitchen table and watch the sand digitally pour through the hourglass. Especially if you are a Very Serious Person.
I’m technologically incapable of embedding the WaPo0 Deadline Clock in this post, but you can see it here. As I write this, it’s at about 3 Days, 6 Hours, 7 minutes and some seconds. I don’t know exactly what cataclysm the editors of The Washington Post expect when it reaches zero. Because the answer is nothing). Nothing will happen.
Except, possibly, Doomsday.
But I’m concerned about the fate of the WaPo0 Clock between now and then. The Stupid-Committee won’t reach an accord because, as David Dayen points out, the primary planks of both parties’ 2012 election strategies are at the crux of the Committee’s decision fulcrum. The GOP can’t possibly give up its adherence to protecting the tax rates of rich people, and Democrats must continue their pretense of protecting Medicare. Since the Stupid-Committee’s discussion boiled down to horse-trading on these two issues, stalemate ensued. No higher taxes for rich people; no cuts in Medicare. Checkmate.
Of course, as Jon Stewart says above, John Kerry talking too much can’t possibly have helped. Really? John Kerry talking too much? Do his fellow Senators know John Kerry?
When, though, does the WaPo0 Deadline Clock get taken down? Are readers to be subjected to the silliness of seeing the Clock continue its relentless decline to a non-existent deadline? Will the WaPo0 take down the clock when the Committee issues its dramatic surrender statement, as early as tomorrow? Or will the ludicrous clock simply halt at the exact moment Patty Murray and Jeb Hensarling wash their hands of this thing, publicly with eyes downcast?
Or will Very Serious People, when logging onto the WaPo0 for the next three days, be forced to simply avert their eyes from this very public sign of “failure?” A “failure” which consists of a select and unaccountable group of legislators unable to reach a behind-closed-doors agreement on 1.2 trillion dollars of deficit cuts to replace the 1.2 trillion dollars of deficit cuts already agreed to by the United States Congress, and signed into law by the President of the United States as all laws must be as provided in our Constitution?
It’s not a trigger, it’s a law. Some “failure.”
Will the clock remain posted on WaPo0 splash page, as any stopped disaster countdown clock should, to remind Americans — including the Very Serious People — how close we came to actual accord by the Stupid-Committee? We should commemorate how narrowly we averted that worst of all possible outcomes for the American people: a bipartisan agreement crafted behind closed doors by an unaccountable group of legislators under the threat of an artificial deadline and revocable trigger.
America dodged a bullet here. And there should be some marker of it for all time, at least on the kitchen tables of Very Serious People who thought this whole elitist enterprise was something other than absurd, anti-democratic codswallop.
Stop the damn clock.




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teddy!
What an excellent post. Thank you, Teddy.
Taking nominations now for the Official Super-Committee Theme Song. Here’s Last Train to Nowhere.
Teddy!
Time to celebrate! The Stupor Committee failed to agree to gut the social safety net and now Congress is obligated to trim a tiny bit of the mounds of rancid pork in the bloated and corrupt defense budget. The Village is of course devastated because they will not be able to pick at the carcass of Social Security like the vultures they are.
Occupy the Stupid-Committee! Just imagine Kerry doing a MIC check. gawd, it would take forever.
suz!
I’m Going Down!
Yes.
You are most welcome! — and thank you, Twain, for the kind words.
Yesterday!~
All the Talking Heads on the necks of the Very Serious People tomorrow will be sad at this public “failure” — while the American people shall be dancing in the streets.
Failure to communicate.
Jeebus, the very idea!
Hello, Goodbye.
Yes – they’re all full of shit.
But I still have huge concerns; because for instance, in the sequesters is indeed a 2% per year cut to Medicare. They’ve all already agreed to it once – including President Osterity.
So in the coming rounds of having to deal with the sequesters – what will they do? Tax cut, preserve the military budget and cut Medicare seem just starters.
It will add more fuel to the OWS fire.
wait – TEDDY! Halloo…
I think so too.
They can’t help themselves. I don’t think any of them truly think they can get away with this indefinitely and if we accept that, then they still can’t prevent themselves going over the cliff. Greed is all they know.
Greed has overrun their own sense of survival.
I wonder if they are even aware of the tinder they might provide to #OWS, though. These are pawns of the oligarchs who live in the Beltway bubble, after all. I can’t imagine Teresa Heinz coming home from the Safeway to complain to her hub about the price of vegetables, can you?
Greetings, sir.
I think you are far to generous. I think they are so arrogant and deluded that they really do believe that they can get away with it forever.
Terasa Heinz
Safeway
I am soooooooo confused.
I hear there have been a spate of firings at FDL. Can you explain?
3 Days 3 Hours 28 Minutes 47 seconds…. until ARMAGEDDON!
I love the conceit of “seconds” on a deadline for a legislative vehicle. Can’t you see Patty Murray running up to the podium in her tennis shoes?
Yeah, you’re fired.
(j/k)
OK. Leaving.
I think that their arrogance and sense of entitlement make them disregard #OWS as just a bunch of dirty hippies who do not matter. While there may be some validity to that view (with no disrespect to the protestors), it ignores the powerful effects that they have had and their ability to shift the national discourse. If #OWS does nothing else, that will be a monumental achievement.
And the stoopid Wapoo – if it was about being a paper and getting circulation, they could do it the old fashioned way by actually REPORTING and putting Dollar Clocks on the heads of the Congress Critters.
But it’s more fun & profitable to be the court jesters to Versailles-on-the-Potomac.
I should have made myself more clear. I meant that if we accept that they must know that they can’t get away with their rape of….everything…. forever, then they still wouldn’t be able to stop themselves going off the cliff. There is a very real possibility however that they, as you suggest, are just so arrogant and deluded that they think they’ll keep on getting away with it but that possibility doesn’t really portray them any more favorably. ;)
Unfortunately I can imagine a bill passing in the next 3 days with nearly unanimous bipartisan support that exempts Defense from any automatic cuts.
As I said, you are too generous to them.
crap. You may be right.
I fear that you may be correct. It says volumes about how dysfunctional our political system has become when the largest, most bloated, corrupt, inefficient, and fraud plagued government agency (it really is what Republicans think all government programs are, on steroids) has become exempt from cuts.
It is no coincidence that it is the murdering arm of the government that needs the most money.
Our only hope is that the rapidly approaching election year inspires the Dems to show a little simulated spine. I kind of doubt it though. “National Security” is that magic ace that trumps sanity every time.
If there had been no Cold War it would have been necessary to invent one.
I wonder what OWS has up its sleeve for the elections. They are the most creative thinkers I have seen in……well……forever.
Well the latest version of the veritable ‘Mushroom Cloud’ is Iran, eh…? 8-(
I hope Ds show no spine whatsoever. Only way for all & sundry to figure out that Ds are worthless.
Definitely have style and verve. If you have not seen this yet, it is totally awesome.
Poor Iran. How many times do we have to fuck with them? We killed their democracy. Now we want to kill their country.
The problem is, as always, what is the alternative?
The alternative is not voting, but in Occupies. Direct democracy.
Oh yes. I think it is the most important video to come out of the movement so far.
did you see the balloons lifting the tents in Berkeley?
The alternative is not to vote. Or to vote down ticket. I never thought I would think such a thing.
I don’t know how many people are planning THAT far ahead.
As long as OWS continues it poses a real conundrum for Dems. They’d like to stomp it out just as much as the GOP but to project any semblance of populism in an election year they have to pretend it is a healthy exercise of democracy. Which is the truth of course but truth is like Kryptonite to the ruling class.
You’ll never go broke betting on Dems being spineless.
Huh?
Given the paradigm shift OWS has created, the Debt Stupid Committee seems like a dinosaur from another era. It’s hard to imagine America was consumed with debt and deficit just six months ago. The talk now is all about inequality and greed — two things that were nowhere on the agenda when Patty Murray got her gavel for this travesty.
Sorry, but I think not voting is conceding defeat and counterproductive. If you do not vote, you have no voice in the system, which is why African Americans, women, and so many others fought so hard to get the vote.
Preparing for the elections is not that far away. What? A few months? You know they are thinking about it. They clearly are thinking their way through this.
That was sooo kewl…! Go, People’s Republic of Berkeley…! *g*
You’re back!!!! Yay!!!
Here’s another cocktail~~~
Ds spinelessness is calculated. So be careful.
Regardless, agree that D spinelessness is OWS best ally.
Yep. That is a massive and very positive shift and they accomplished it almost overnight. I am really impressed, but am waiting to see how they follow up on it.
Oy, you appeal to my lowest denominator.
Good on you.
I simply cannot vote for Obama. I will vote down ticket but I won’t vote for a murderer and a liar. It was hard enough for me to vote for Clinton.
The Overton Window has finally been thrown wide open…! ;-)
Great post, Teddy…! *g*
And it has been windexed!
Wanna get summin to come & clean my windows. Got any idears?
Time for me to toddle off. Have students to abuse in the morning. Take care all.
Pleasant dreams, Dr. D…!
I feel the same way but I don’t think in my case it counts as a principled stand. I’m fairly confident he’ll still carry Illinois, albeit by a narrower margin than ’08.
Nite DrD.
Be nice to your students.
OWS has changed the national conversation, which is a damn good thing.
Obama is especially pissed because he’s not going to get his “grand bargain”. The GOP’s absolute hatred of Obama has more to do with the failure of the committee than OWS. Despite Obama and the Dems putting everything on the table, the GOP still wouldn’t give in to them. Their hatred of Obama is too strong. But then, it saved Social Security and Medicare from Obama’s machinations.
Have fun!
Nighters.
I always prefer to make a distinction between Republicans and Republican voters. The latter hate Obama. I don’t think the pols do, they more likely appreciate the fact that he provides such abundant red meat for the base while providing a useful mouth-breather distraction from their own malfeasance.
This.
The shorter the time, the more we are in it, or of it. My 80 year old father has a slew of timers –what is the collective noun? a dread? a doomsday?–scattered around the house that he sets to keep himself busy, focused, undistracted: the annoying bruxating half-broken buzz of the oven timer for cheese toast and boiling water; the digital timer by his armchair that pierces both Dad’s ear buds and tympanic membrane like a carbon monoxide alarm but does meritorious service in alerting him to the dangers of excessive surfing –that the oven timer has been buzzing dutifully for some time, that his toast is carbonized panko, that the coffee pot has boiled dry; or the tomato. The tomato, a 30 minute timer, graded in minutes that sometimes refuses to sound no matter the interval. That if set for 30 has never been closer than 26:23 on the short side, but has broken the 32 minute barrier when tardy. My father has sought to correct the temporal infidelity of this tomato through surgery. I have seen it etherized upon the kitchen table, sometimes for days, in a state of disassembly: split in two on sterile field with springs, gears, posts exposed or removed, with tiny snips, screw drivers, pliers, nail files, and a small tin of 3-in-1 oil at the ready. After all this effort, the tomato achieved the rude mechanical equivalent of an accurately elapsed 15 minutes, then reverted to prior form. There are several others.
Before your buzzer goes off about my father’s state of mind, I should add that as a boy, he played a prank on an older sister by rebuilding her Baby Ben to run backward. His skill in tinkering with time is unmatched in our family. My mother dreams of a good rain–when she will bag the timers up and drown them in the flood channel.
But I digress. Something about social media and the anti-climactic meta-reveal. It’s a weak dramatic tension. The audience knows the outcome prior to checking their coats. We regret having bought tickets; we watch out of obligation. Anyway, the parking’s already paid. Then we’ll go out for a good gelato and espresso. Teddy, you’re so right.
You got that right, rattie….you got that right.
… and another thread dies at eCAHN’s hand.
Oh, well.
nice writing~
Charming story. Thank you for sharing a chuckle.
Let’s hope you’re right, Teddy.
The marionette masters always find a way to snatch capitulation against the 99% from the jaws of victory.
Nice work.
Great job Firedogs. Wonderful post Teddy!
hiya CE
Obama talks so often of this “Grand Bargain”, I wonder if it is not with the devil himself.
I am trying to remember what the name of an election is when you vote for your first choice, then second and on. Anyone remember?
…when she will bag the timers up and drown them in the flood channel.
*heh* No doubt…! ;-)
Hiya PPDCUS,
How are you in this crazy environment — my political clock is unwound. And wanting more. I’m trying to explain to my 88 year old Dad what OWS is all about.
I no longer question whether or not Obama has sold his soul….I’m sure he has, as have they all. Book Salon on Sat. was pretty depressing… but didn’t tell me anything new except just how really toasted we all are. What a sad turn of events after all the Hope&Change. I got snookered and I’m ashamed for being such a fool at this late stage.
Hope springs eternal. And fuck Obama. You made the right decision with the information you had.
I have to get away from the computer. I have been here all day. ouch. See you later!
Thank you very much.
And hello, Christine.
Ranked Choice Voting.
SF elected a centrist, corporate-friendly mayor this month, using this system for the first time: the appointed protege of the protege of machine pol Willie Brown, perpetuating sixteen years of Downtown rule.
Go figure.
Teddy,
You are the greatest. I love your posts.
Sounds like SF to me.
He’s certainly Slick Willie these days, eh…? 8-(
I hate to be a spoil sport but there is still time for the Dems to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory -
Never underestimate the ability of the Dem elites to sell out everything we hold near and dear.
When western civilization balanced on the edge of a knife in the late 1930′s, perhaps your dad could relate to standing up to sociopaths, CE?
It’s always helpful to know who is paying for our Super Committee.
Super Committee members want to pass the corporate repatriation tax holiday proposed last month by Sens. Hagan and McCain, that would enable companies to bring back $1.4 trillion in offshore accounts — at a 5-8 percent tax rate instead of 35 percent that is the law.
This tax “holiday” would give big business the money it needs for sweet Christmas executive bonuses, and to replenish the pot to buy off politicians.
Here is a link to a MapLight report that explains how big companies like Citigroup donate big bucks to members of the Super Committee.
http://maplight.org/content/72872
(summary) Nov. 19, 2011 – Members of the Joint Select Committee on Deficit Reduction, also known as the “Super Committee,” are hopeful that a repatriation tax holiday allowing domestic companies to claim profits made overseas at reduced tax rates will boost the economy by encouraging capital investment and job growth here in the United States. A similar proposal was enacted in 2004 (P.L. 108-357), however, and, according to a May 2011 report by the Congressional Research Service, “while empirical evidence is clear that this provision resulted in a significant increase in repatriated earnings, empirical evidence is unable to show a corresponding increase in domestic investment or employment.”
The report highlights 12 companies that took advantage of the tax holiday but did not increase employment, and in most cases reduced employment, in the years following taking advantage of the tax holiday. Below is MapLight’s analysis of campaign contributions to members of the Super Committee from PACs and employees connected to the companies mentioned.
And squish any efforts by the Dems to hijack the Occupy movement.
John Kerry was on FOX today, boasting that his wife has $3 billion, mistake, cross that out please.
John Kerry was on FOX today explaining that the rich slug committee Democrats wanted to cut Medicare and Social Security, but the Republicans didn’t want any tax increases.
Then, he said that the Democrats will agree to all cuts if the GOP doesn’t try to overturn the end of the Bush tax cuts – the same cuts that will happen anyway.
Thank God the fool was never elected President.