So my beloved home state, New York, looks poised to become the 6th state to allow gays to marry. Which is perfectly shocking. I mean, whoever would have thought we’d be less gay than frickin’ Iowa?

But anyhow, hey, it’s a win! To be sure, it’s not a done deal yet, and the legislation will contain a number of silly “exemptions” insisted upon by religious wingnuts. Ostensibly these exemptions are necessary to defend against the hideous specter of state troopers compelling at gunpoint the plain people of Candor to rent out their Knights of Columbus hall for Adam and Steve’s big gay reception. First they got the right to marry, then they came for our Geneee Cream Ale kegs and green bean supreme…. But really the “exemptions” are necessary to provide the Catholic Church, which has run out of  spurious arguments sufficient to justify its bigotry on the marriage issue, barely plausible legal cover to deny charity to the sick children of lesbians, as Jesus taught them is just and proper.

What I meant was, it’s a win. And what’s the fun of winning if you can’t make fun of the losers, in this case State Senator Ruben Diaz (D-12th Century) and Michael Long (Chairman of the Conservative Party of New York, a consolation prize he accepted after losing out in his bid for King of the Dipshits). Diaz is a real piece of work. But the best part of this piece of guff is the polling data:

The National Organization for Marriage released a poll of registered New Yorkers, conducted this past weekend. Fifty-seven percent of New York voters agree that “marriage should only be between a man and a woman” versus 32 percent who disagree. Meanwhile, the new NOM poll shows that only about one in four New York voters (26 percent) prefer legislators in Albany to decide this issue, while 59 percent say the issue of marriage should be decided by the voters in New York.

Hahahahahahaha. A National Organization for Marriage poll! Comedy. The NOM nom nom yum yum gullible bigotry poll has some problems, like a ludicrously low sample size comprised of old wingnuts, and the fact that it was commissioned and run by bigots.

Diaz & Long want us to know:

Gay marriage is not inevitable.

Well, yeah, it is. But we’re not bitter. We’ll save some green bean supreme for you.