WASHINGTON, DC – Human-rights activists have become increasingly frustrated by the Obama Administration’s inaction as Bahrain’s crackdown against pro-democracy protestors continues. In an apparent response to allegations of hypocrisy, the White House has revealed that President Obama and Secretary of State Hillary Clinton are considering sending a Sternly Worded Letter to the troubled Middle Eastern nation.
The deployment of a Sternly Worded Letter (or SWL) would be a very serious action, and some foreign policy experts fear that it could destabilize an already-delicate region even further. Adding to the uncertainty, it is not yet known whether the President would seek congressional or United Nations approval before taking action, and legal scholars are split on whether such approval would be necessary. Some believe that the 2003 AUMF grants him the necessary authority, others believe he needs a separate AUSWL, while still others believe that it is an inherent executive power.
“The Constitution is very clear on the division of war-making powers between the executive and legislative branches, but the language on letter-writing authority is very murky, perhaps even deliberately so,” explained noted Constitutional scholar John Yoo while fidgeting with a nutcracker. “Unfortunately, the available precedents we have to refer to are few and far between.”
The most famous use of the Sternly Worded Letter was shortly before the Spanish-American War, when President McKinley sent what was at the time a state-of-the-art SWL to Spain, to devastating effect. However, McKinley obtained congressional approval and the UN did not yet exist, so it is not a very instructive example.
President Kennedy’s advisers recommended that he send an SWL to Krushchev but he refused. His restraint is believed to have prevented the start of World War III. It is also rumored that the second President Bush considered deploying an SWL to Iraq, but ultimately decided it would be easier and “awesomer” to invade instead.
When questioned about the President’s intentions, White House Press Secretary Jay Carney responded, “The President is very cognizant of the unfortunate situation in Bahrain and understands and shares the desire for decisive action. On the other hand, he does not want to repeat his predecessor’s mistakes by acting hastily. The President will deliberate carefully with Secretary Clinton and weigh all the possible consequences of an SWL before reaching a decision, and you can rest assured that he will not take action without a firm and flexible plan in place for dealing with the aftermath.”
Conservative commentators have excoriated the President for his indecision. “I think Barack Obama does our country a grave disservice by signaling weakness in a time of humanitarian crisis,” opined Weekly Standard editor William Kristol. “A President should never hesitate to use an SWL to project our moral authority overseas.” Right-wing provocateur Ann Coulter was even more blunt: “B. Hussein Obama is a pansy. If I were President I would fill the skies with Predator drones personally delivering SWLs to every Muslim in the Middle East. Write ‘em all, and let God sort ‘em out, I say. But the Kenyan pretender doesn’t have the stones.”
As expected, Congressional Democrats were protective of what they view as their constitutional prerogatives. “A Sternly Worded Letter isn’t something you can just throw around willy-nilly,” huffed House Judiciary Committee Ranking Member John Conyers. “It should be an option of last resort, and it should never, ever be used without congressional approval. If President Obama chooses to ignore this bedrock constitutional principle, we’ll… we’ll… Well, we’ll think of something.”



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ELI!
BUZZ!
ELI! and BUZZ!
This is so subtle that I can’t tell if it is a joke or not.
MaryMc!
MARY!
If Eli wrote it there is some humor in there somewhere.
Does a SWL require an exit strategy?
Only if the returning SWL has the correct zip code. You make a mistake and put the wrong zip code and hundreds, if not thousands, of mail persons will be greatly confused.
Gah!
Can you elaborate, please?
ELI!!!! NOOOOO, not a sternly worded letter. Oh please, not that!!!
BLUETOE!!!! Serious times call for serious actions.
ROTFL. This really is just too funny. Those SWLs are a mighty tool.
Mighty tools call for… mighty tools.
Serious
timesSWL’s call for seriousactionsgrammar.The advantage of a SWL is its accuracy — it goes right where you send it, unlike bombs. The military claims that 50% of their “smart” bombs fall within 25 feet of the target which while true under test conditions doesn’t apply in the real world,like say, Benghazi where bombs were dropped all around (for humanitarian purposes).
So, while getting support for a SWL is more difficult than bombing, we should push for it. Besides the fact that the Saudi and Bahraini fat-ass potentates have us by the short hairs, that is.
i hear that GE is pushing to get the contract for the next generation joint strike SWL.
The one with the extra stationery that even the Pentagon says they don’t need?
Someone needs to write an expose about the mission creep inherent in SWL’s.
(Anyway, I don’t see what’s wrong with the A4 – it may be old-fashioned, but it gets the job done.)
Postage Due
A 8 1/2 x 11 (original size) paper airplane (signed by many cruise missive liberals) wouldn’t fit, though.
On edit: yes it would (unthough)
Somebody triggered a GED ad on the page.
Last time I read the Constitution, the power to send SWL was vested solely in congress.
More imperial prez takeover of congressional powers.
And I suppose congress will just bend of & take it.
SWL…is that like one of those letters your attorney friend agrees to write for you to deal with uncomfortable circumstances…or cease and desist…or if your dog craps on my lawn one more time, I’ll take legal action? I’ll bet Bahrain is shakin’ in their boots…
“Sternly worded letter…”
Yeah, he’s good at that. Check out Ben Sargent’s ‘toon:
http://news.yahoo.com/comics/ben-sargent#id=/comics/uclickcomics/20110413/cx_bs_uc/bs20110413
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XnS49c9KZw8
The SWL must go out quickly or else I fear an imminent economic collapse. Do we truly want burden our mutated descendants with this folly? On the other hand, if we do not sent out the SWL then the invisible hand will have beat us at our own game once again. Maybe Obama needs to call in a favor to his good friends and insular intellects of the IMF and the Cato Institute. More advice is needed. That’s the way forward!
on second thought, a SWL doesn’t contain depleted uranium and is unlikely to kill anyone. more concrete action by anyone in deecee is not likely to do better than that….
so, yeah, i’m down with the SWL.
and since congressional approval is uncertain, i think we’d better start a whip campaign in support of the president’s proposal.
But but but, in the hands of the prez, can’t SWL quickly escalate into a quagmire?
Reminds me of the grunt’s response in Aliens to the incompetent lieutenant, when he order his team to give up its ammo when they were inside the nuclear power plant. “What are we supposed to use, harsh language?”
The aliens guarding momma alien and her nest made short work of them, except for Ripley, Newt, Bishop and Hicks. The players here are different, of course, but the strategy seems equally ill-conceived.
Congress cannot approve cause none of the forkers can read.
who’s up for a cheer?
what do i want? COLLAPSE!
when do i want it? NOW! (x50)
hey hey! ho ho!
empire shit has got to go! (x50)
oligarchs, on the attack!
what do we do? STAND UP FIGHT BACK! (X50)
ahhh ..
/cheerleader mode
You haven’t seen O’s supply of stationary & cluster bomb pens. For Easter fireworks (or whatever the analogous Muslim holiday is) he’s got a special supply of white phosphorus fireworks.
Michelle has insisted that all those supplies must be organic & grown on the WH lawn.
yikes!
good point!
thanks for the reality check. i withdraw my previous comment.
Really nice to jest with ya. I’ve been enjoying having you back, girlfriend.
SWL’s?! Child’s play. Obama needs to send them a real message and challenge them to a game of Paper, Rock, Scissors.
11-dimensional paper, rock, scissors, you forgot to mention.
(((ecahn))) good to be back.
p.s. you are on fire this thread. “cluster bomb pens?” ROFLOL!
3D 11-dimensional paper, rock, scissors, you forgot to mention!
I wrote a “sternly worded” letter once. I never got a reply.
I haven’t gotten my special delivery 3D glasses, so I want him to wait until they arrive so I can fully participate in the spectacle.
That would have been a SWR, had you gotten one.
The President needs to be careful here, because, as the last President and Donny Rumsfeld proved, beyond a shadow of a doubt, sometimes what you think you know is really too much to know, and then you get confused so it’s best to let the free market fix it, but who knows really? And if that is the case then the whole concept of the ‘letter’ is just another example of discretionary spending and immaturity which actually harms America.
Yes, quite a quandary for the dynamic duo Obama and Hillary. Too bad about all those dying Shiites.
You & I have elived together thru many hours of boring congressional testimony, which have resulted in nothing more than SWLs. Musta subconsciously contributed to the development of my sense of irony & snark on the subject.
O only knows what he knows. But he doesn’t know what that is, or whether what he knows is known. And half of what he knows is unknown. The other half comes from the CIA, so you know….
Well if there’s nothing to be done, further comment is useless now, isn’t it?
good to know the time wasn’t a complete waste!
(actually i learned a lot)
Not at all. We’re having fun yet.
must have been a knockout SWL.
Ah yes, the invisible hand again. Damn them! Does O know that we know this and he does not? A mystery for sure.
Your SWL was that powerful.
Great. The cleaning lady class gets to lord it over the non-cleaning lady class about how right they were.
Check.
huh?
I wrote a SWL letter once (to my son’s lower school head), and more recently sent a SWemail to Alice Rivlin. In both cases, I quickly learned a lesson that I had missed in my Poison Ivy League education. Both peeps responded that they were “sorry that I was so angry,” and that “it was no way to start a dialogue.”
Existential question: Can the invisible hand sign a SWL?
Yes, but only in invisible ink.
Enjoyable thread, Eli. Thanks
D’oh.
Yet one more obvious thing I didn’t see.
Add it to the long list.
My pleasure. I was a little worried at first…
You do realize most FDL peeps don’t have cleaning ladies, AmIRight?
hilarious, eli. thanks.
Everyone went somewhere this afternoon. Just disappeared about 4pm.
Yes, I picked that up a long time ago.
The reason she comes up in conversation is bc I have learned so much from her.
I’m sorry you resent that.
Adding to the uncertainty, it is not yet known whether the President would seek congressional or United Nations approval before taking action, and legal scholars are split on whether such approval would be necessary. Some believe that the 2003 AUMF grants him the necessary authority, others believe he needs a separate AUSWL, while still others believe that it is an inherent executive power.
Wake me when Obama sends Hilary simpering with the strongly worded letter I am sure the GOP will look at this post and think Obama is about to depose Bahrain.
I’m not sure whats more sad Obama pretending he stands for human rights or the GOP worried he might stand for human rights against an oil nation.
I think the only real foreign policy experts are on the Left.
Ratheon is celebrating tonight, you betcha.
Licking their chops at having to replace all those anti-SWL missiles.
No, it’s that people without cleaning ladies have an entirely different view of the world.
Just remember that as you opine.
Listening to common people instead of making stuff up about what common people believe which both the GOP and Dems do shows we are worthy of taking power.
Elite Ruling classes who forget the common people lose the Mandate of Heaven as the Chinese put it. As so above as so below when the 2 are disconnected their is chaos. Cripes I think I read to much Chinese Philosophy I’m starting to sound like them its not a bad thing but weird.
Great idea eCAHN! Alas we would find out the truth of the actual signer of the SWL only through a Bradley Manning type…perhaps one of those young erstwhile Democratic Presidential Interns.
I do think the invisible hand can do anything, as long as there is plausible deniability. The invisible hand is everywhere you know, doing all sorts of things to make us safer and wealthier. It seems to me a win-win if Obama got the invisible hand in on this SWL. I hope one of those Presidential Interns assigned to read and surveil FDL will twitter this info to Obama immediately…before he makes another mistake.
Jared Diamond has a great quote about societies that fail because the ruling class is insulated from the suffering of the lower classes if I could remember close to the exact words I would google it.
Food and gas prices are causing riot and rebellion in the Arab world America is the world’s bread basket and last I heard our stock piles of grain are at a real low level.
A bad harvest this year in America more global warming freak weather flooding in Pakistan heat waves in Russia and we could have food riots here.
It could be French Revolution time.
Speaking of invisible hands, can the prez interns give invisible hand jobs?
SWL are of what use the people don’t care because they mean nothing. The Left knows they mean nothing but ok we do pay attention to them. The GOP use them to attack Obama or any Dem as weak the GOP never says crap about a GOP SWL so the SWL accomplishes what besides giving the GOP a chance to attack Obama?
Politically a SWL helps a Dem like shooting themselves in the foot.
Probably depends on where they did their undergrad work…or perhaps how they funded their undergrad work. You know college is expensive these daze.
My favorite Jared Diamond thought is: What were the folks on Easter Island thinking when they cut down the last tree?
When I first came across Jared Diamonds’ Collapse, I thought it was a tautology. Then I observed more & more of what went on inside the Beltway & got a whole new perspective on it.
Ask Bill chances are Monica was not the only one just the one who got caught I wonder what she’s doing these days was she rewarded with a cush job or cast aside?
Free market economics that focus on today’s needs outweigh trivial concerns about the future?
Actually, internships are yet another way the rich separate themselves from the poor. Only recent college grads from rich families can afford to live & work in DC with no pay, strictly in the pursuit of ‘contacts.’
A minor, but still important way that the rich get richer and power gets concentrated.
Don’t worry, the invisible hand has taken care of her.
Was Newt reincarnated from an Easter Island Chief?
Lots of Professional jobs are like that its a class barrier that needs to be studied.
Yes, true, and so definitely a remote possibility that they care about Bradley Manning, or the slave labor force of Bahrain and Saudi Arabia.
From her wiki.
Sounds consistent with what we knew about her. Not sure what the 2-word summary might be; maybe intelligent fashionista?
Yep.
Any ideas where to start searching getting jobs seems not to be my area of expertise much less good jobs:)
Agree.
Moving upstairs to LN.
In a manner of speaking. She was betrayed by that perfidious Tripp woman, Bill was the one who was caught.
(When I saw that Tripp woman on tv, I was certain she was the same woman on the train in 1985 (en route to DC from points south) who the guys I was with — a reporter for the Miami Herald and a lawyer on his way to WVA to work at the Law Poverty Cntr — said was hitting on me, as in “I just checked on my daughter in our car; she’s asleep”.)
I don’t trust that Invisible Hand – you don’t know where it’s been, and if it washed itself afterwards.