Michael Medved is even more of a douche than his mustache suggests.

With all exceptions duly noted, I think it fair to say that what liberals mostly see when they look at this country is injustice and oppression of every kind economic, social and political. By sharp contrast, conservatives see a nation shaped by a complex of traditions, principles and institutions that has afforded more freedom and, even factoring in periodic economic downturns, more prosperity to more of its citizens than in any society in human history.

Conservative guys drive like this! Liberal guys drive like this!

Actually, I think it fair to say that what really distinguishes "liberals" and "conservatives" is that "conservatives" are obsessed with essentialist horseshit about what "liberals" and "conservatives" are Really All About. "Conservatives" are deep into tribalism because they get off on it and going "woo we’re great" is easier and more self-gratifying than trying to deal with actual, you know, facts. (We’re #15!)

That liberals could like America — we built it, after all — and still want to, you know, catch up to the rest of the developed world in, say, infant mortality rates is perhaps incomprehensible to Medved, but that’s probably because he likes it that so many American infants die even though our Medical Facilities Are Championship Class. I suppose that’s because Medved, like Conservatives generally, is all about killing babies.

Anyway, I kid Medved, but that’s only because I think he’s a shithead. To be fair, this really is why I’m a liberal:

The bitterness of the current health care debate demonstrates the power of this important insight. Liberals invariably plead that the United States must follow the example of Britain or France, Canada or Cuba, and expand the governmental role in medicine to guarantee health care as a sacred human right. The left insists that despite the high cost of American medical care we actually lag far behind more enlightened countries in health outcomes. Conservatives, on the other hand, while decrying the rise in costs, cite the many ways that the US system leads the world (in technological breakthroughs, as well as responsiveness where America is ranked number one by the World Health Organization of the UN). Conservatives want other countries to learn from us and follow our example; liberals long for the United States to learn from our European counterparts and to follow their example.

Because as far as health outcomes go, who the hell knows! Go jingoism! But that aside, we’re probably behind Canada overall, but they get it without wasting nearly as much money.

For Medved and wingnuts generally, getting a better product for less money is un-American. Why do they think this? I dunno. Because they are a Tribe of Douchebags, perhaps. Or maybe there are other reasons.