Bad news for extra-terrestrial Jesus Horses

On the fortieth anniversary of man setting footprints on the moon that will last for thousands of years, unless they are obliterated by a Mentos ad, comes the news that Jupiter’s sanctity was violated by a member of the C-Street Fellowship comet or meteor leaving a scar about the size of Lou Dobb’s ego the earth.

This is a tragedy of epic proportions for the Obama Administration as Jupiter is where Hawaii stores its vital records — at least according to Glenn Beck. On the other hand FoxNews personality Bill O’Reilly is quick to point out that Jupiter had it coming with its pastel coloring and putting itself right next to the Asteroid Belt.

I would like to thank Jupiter for being so damned big that it has taken a few for the solar system, specifically us. The last event like this being almost exactly 15 years ago with the Shoemaker-Levy comet. The scary thing is, we knew about that event more than a year in advance, this one only afterward.

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