Obama SpeechNon-Comprehensive Issues Checklist:

Economy - We can fix it if we stop fucking around.  Lending fund, cramdowns, vague bank fixes.
Healthcare - We’re working on it, we’re totally going to fix it.
Social Security – We need to fix it… somehow.  "Tax-free universal savings accounts"?
Education - GI Bill, but with America Corps.  Shame the dropouts!
Environment/Energy – Cap & trade, subsidies for renewables.  Clean coal.
Bipartisanship - We all love America.
Civil rights/liberties – Closing Gitmo, speedy trials, no torture.
BushCo. Accountability – Bupkis.
Iraq - We’re getting out.
Iran - Nope.
Afghanistan - We have a plan.
Gaza - Nought.
Manimals - Dammit, I was sure he would cover this.
Mars, Bitches! – Oh well.

Issues list will be tersely updated throughout the address.

10:14 – JINDAL:  Just wait ’til I get to ‘pre-existing condition.’ Totally slay ‘em. (Jane)

1012 – Tape rolls live in Louisiana.  Bobby Jindal is overheard, off-camera, shouting "HOW THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO REBUT THAT?!" (WT)

10:12 – Gee, look who Lieberman’s getting his PDAs from. Certain rough justice in McCain having a fickle man walk away from him. (Julia)

10:11 – She’s like the Morganna The Kissing Bandit of Congress. (Eli)

10:10 – LOOK OUT!  IT’S MICHELE BACHMANN! (WT)

10:10 – PBS says he was interrupted by applause 52 times (Julia)

10:09 – Man, that was one sour, sorry lot when they flashed to the wrinkly old GOP Senators.  What a bunch of mopes. (bmaz)

10:08 – Bobby Jindal is scrambling right now – "Is there time to retape my rebuttal?" (WT)

10:08 – Obama thinks they all love this country and want it to succeed.  May be so, but awfully hard to believe sometimes… (Eli)

10:07 – "I know we haven’t agreed on every issue thus far." (Eli)

10:07 – I am loving watching that little girl get a hug from the first lady. Good for her. (Julia)

10:06 – Anecdote about a little girl from South Carolina asking for help for her school because it was little more than a shack:  Take THAT, Mark Sanford! (PW)

10:05 – I want that dress Michelle is wearing.  I understand this isn’t a political statement, but it’s the truth.  Now back to our programming. (WT)

10:05 – SC schoolgirl who wrote Congress a letter asking for help, for an education, for a chance to become something.  "We are not quitters." (Eli)

10:03 – Republicans think, "What is this . . . ‘altruism’ of which you speak?" (WT)

10:03 – Bonus-sharing Leonard Abess held up as, basically, the opposite of the greedy Wall Street assholes. (Eli)

10:02 – Wow. John McCain has no shame at all. I can’t believe he got up to applaud no torture when he made sure we couldn’t stop the last administration from doing it. (Julia)

10:01 – KERRY:  "Windsurfing…what was I thinking…" (Jane)

10:01 – The United States does not torture!  We will, however, make the Republicans feel as much psychic pain as possible. (WT)

10:00 – Closing Gitmo, trials for terrorism suspects, now we can really say we don’t torture. (Eli)

9:59 – We will actually PROVIDE veterans with benefits!  What a novel idea! (WT)

9:59 – Better pay for troops, better care for vets.  Wow, that almost sounds like… support. (Eli)

9:58 – We have a plan for Afghanistan and Pakistan, extremists bad. (Eli)

9:57 – We’re getting the hell out of Iraq. (Eli)

9:57 – No more sneaky budget dodges. (Eli)

9:56 – Obama rehashes tax cut/increase plan from the campaign. (Eli)

9:55 – "But let me perfectly clear, because I know you’ll hear the same old claims that rolling back these tax breaks means a massive tax increase on the American people:  if your family earns less than $250,000 a year, you will not see your taxes increased a single dime.  I repeat: not one single dime."  does that rule out Social Security taxes on those making $250,000 per year.  Is so, what’s left? (Scarecrow)

9:53 – Oh, SNAP!  No more no-bid military contracts!  Dick Cheney just banged on the lid of his coffin in disgust. (WT)

9:53 – GOP tops pissy obstructionist stimulus stunt with group audition for MEAN GIRLS II (Jane)

9:52 – The red line finally drops on earmarks.  I think the redline is being controlled by John McCain. (WT)