Why is it that every tale of legislative GOP woe is beginning to sound like Percy Blakeney foppery redux? Witness the latest yarn spinning from Orrin Hatch via K-Tum:

“I’m bitterly disappointed,” said Hatch, adding he wished Democrats had brought back the old legislation. “It represented a compromise, and laid the foundation for bipartisanship and trust,” he said. “The bill being considered this week is not that bill.”

Democrats said the changes they made were needed, and reasonable. They include eliminating a five-year waiting period for new, legal immigrant children and mothers to enroll in the program, slightly loosening identity requirements, and in some cases loosening family income limits on eligibility for SCHIP coverage.

Sink me! How dare those Democrats want to actually help the increasing numbers of desperately needy kids whose families are hurting in the current nasty economic situation?!? Or, worse yet, give a hoot about the science of public health instead of making faux hay from imaginary political optics?

Via HHS:

“With unemployment numbers rising and the economy struggling to regain momentum, more and more American families are relying on SCHIP to insure their children get the health coverage they need,” said Acting HHS Secretary Charles Johnson. “It is no surprise that SCHIP enrollment went up in 2008 and we expect this trend to continue well into 2009 if the program is reauthorized.”…

It’s about the kids who need the help, not political fakery. America’s families need some help right now, in case folks inside the Beltway hadn’t noticed.

Might I suggest, Orrin, that you straighten that powdered wig of yours, and repurpose your huffing and puffing toward Mitch McConnell and his crew of miscreants for helping the Bush White House scuttle the bill the last time around? All the pearl clutching in the world isn’t going to make any thinking person buy your revisionist malarky.

The GOP over-played it’s greedy hand on SCHIP the last time around, making Ebenezer Scrooge look positively saintly. And the need for help is worse now than it was back then.

New day, new deal.

Next time, get yer own caucus in order, Orrin.