Nooners on election night by twolf

Nooners, no doubt recovering from a massive three-day Tanqueray bender:

This is already a dramatic time—two wars, economic collapse—and people are rattled. "Moderation in all things." It should be noted here that the split in the popular vote was 53% to 46%. That is a solid seven-point win for the new president elect, but it also means more than 56 million voters went for John McCain in a year when all the stars were aligned against the Republicans…Mr. Obama has a significant portion of the nation to win over. He acknowledged this in his sterling victory speech, when he spoke of "those whose support I have yet to earn." He does have yet to earn it.

And here’s Nooner in ecstacy over W’s staggering 2-point win over John Kerry.

George W. Bush is the first president to win more than 50% [note: it was 50.7%] of the popular vote since 1988… The president received more than 59 million votes, breaking Ronald Reagan’s old record of 54.5 million…It will be hard for the mainstream media to continue, in the face of these facts, the mantra that we are a deeply and completely divided country. But they’ll try!

Nothing in there about how a razor-thin, 2-point, 1-state victory — the narrowest by an incumbent since 1916 — is a sign that Bush should "moderate." Nothing about a "split" of the popular vote. Nothing about the 59 million Americans (a record) who voted against Bush and the GOP’s policies. They’re simply absorbed in Nooner’s Completely United States of Bush.

Anyway, Nooners — just for the hell of it, what do all those Republican voters want?

They want peace, progress in the economy and nothing socially extreme.

Uh-huh, that’s why they voted for endless war, the awesome Bush economy, and Terry Schiavo/banning teh gays/repealing Roe.

C’mon, Nooners–bottom line this for us.

This was not 1980, with a landslide 10-point, 44-state win and the will of a clear majority firmly revealed. 

It’s so true. 53%-46% and 364-173 are virtual tossups. No clear majority at all! Who can be sure what the country really wants?

Better play it safe and govern like that nice moderate McCain-Palin administration would.