Slate put up a list of John McCain’s pending "Hail Mary Stunts". Yes, some of them are quite possible, if staid by his new standards, after all what can really top his Vice Presidential Nominee, a spokesmodel who is not even allowed to speak? Well, at least I thought that until he decided yesterday that "Mister, we could use a man like Herbert Hoover again."

Here are a few guaranteed stunts that I foresee over the next few weeks.

1. Daniel Plainview as as Secretary of Energy in waiting. He’ll drill baby drill, and if you don’t like it, well if you can’t stand the heat stay out of the bowling alley.

2. Declare Werther’s Originals the National Candy.

3. Skip another debate, instead jump the shark-filled waters of the Snake River Canyon.

Take this post as your opportunity to add other desperate gimmicks likely to come to pass.

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  1. Legacies
  2. Pull Up a Chair
  3. Sunday Late Night: Stupak, Defined