Well, David Brooks has pooped out yet another bizarre and inexplicable column.  This time, he’s claiming that victory in November will go to whichever presidential candidate is the weirdest.  No, seriously, I’m not making this up:

From voters, the demand is: Surprise Me Most. For candidates, the lesson is: Weirdness Wins.

Huh.  Then again, look what he considers "weird":

Last winter, Barack Obama succeeded by running a weird campaign. He wasn’t just a normal politician aiming for office, he was going to cleanse the country of the baby-boom culture war mentality. In his soaring speeches, he denounced the mores of both the Clinton and Bush eras and made an argument for unity and hope over endless partisan warfare.

Hey, if Bobo thinks wanting to make our political discourse less toxic is "weird," then I guess I can see why voters might want more of it.

But then he veers all the way into Confuse-A-Cat territory:

Now the campaign has become a battle between two different definitions of change. The Obama camp has become the champion of policy change — after eight years of failed Bush-McCain policies, it is time for different, Democratic ones. The McCain campaign is the champion of systemic change — after two decades of bickering and self-dealing, its time to shake up the whole system in order to get things done.

The McCain campaign is- what? The- But- They-

[incoherent spluttering]

Are you out of your cotton-picking mind???  How on earth is McCain "the champion of systemic change"?  How is McCain going to "shake up the whole system"?  He surrounds himself with lobbyists!  Not only has he shown no interest in campaign finance reform since McCain-Feingold, he’s been going in the opposite direction!  He agrees with Bush on practically everything!  His "reformer" running mate is a corrupt, power-abusing, investigation-stonewalling religious zealot earmark queen!

Can someone please tell me how a President McCain would bring "systemic change" in any sense other than "making everything much, much worse"?  Criminy, if weirdness wins this election, I’m afraid we may be looking at President Brooks next January.  Or President Crispin Glover, but that might actually be kind of cool.


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