So sad about your sister being victimized and seemingly “enthralled” to a perpetrator mentality in other people and systems.

There is female misogyny for sure that is turned on others, male and female, who are not safely traditional status quo and I think subconsciously they turn it onto themselves. I remember that moment of betrayal when Whoopie Goldberg’s character in the Color Purple tells her stepson who seeks advice about his uppity wife, Oprah. And Whoopie looks him in the eye and says “Beat her.” I gasped. But oppressed people oppress others since they aren’t free. They are treated as objects and they objectify those weaker. Like how the Nazi’s recruited Jewish prisoners to guard other Jewish prisoners.

The “partnership” system instead of a poisonous patriarchal one is what is needed. Subject to subject, not subject (male) to object (female).

I must say, for my best “professional” job, I was hired by my boss because of all the people he interviewed, I was the only one not too uptight to laugh at his teasing AND to tease him back.
Luckily. the wrong interviewer, and I wouldn’t even have gotten a “no, thanks” letter. He was young–mis030’s in 1994.
So, some of these old dinosaurs are dying out and being replaced with men who can deal with funny women.

we all want to get what we want, from small things to large things, it’s all in how you go about getting it. and male or female, you should have a wide open road to pursue whatever that is……i did…..

we give to get, we work to get, we manipulate to get, we help others to get, there are a miriad of names for how we each go about getting it. each different according to what sector of society you’re in and what you’re using to get it.
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how many women are still the main responders when it comes to the things that are necessary in a household? meals, grocery, laundry, cleaning, the every single day things.

and the men the fringe, fill-in chores.

kinda makes me wonder. it should come down to who wants to be responsible for something, if both are, then both share the work if able…….that’s what it is to me.

i’ve read some pretty sexist and ineffective ways to go about doing things that reinforce that role in these comments from ’feminists’…….and you don’t even know you’re saying them………

we’ve got a long way to go till it’s just people using their talents to their highest level, and whomever is best at cooking or cleaning or shopping or repairs or yardwork or bills or a job is the one who does it in the household or the workplace, cuz it’s more efficient, not cuz one person is supposed to do it or can’t.

until that is the norm, well, i’ll just keep on reading and thinking, ummmmm, you ’missed that part in the middle’.

my step-sister years ago and her girlfriend were slamming tv commercials as sexist when i visited there, i was taken aback, i didn’t see it at all–what’s so wrong with ’girl’ toys and ’boy’ toys…….years later, ever since then, i hear it, and i heard it here, too………

i had a non-traditional job for years, and i wasn’t shrill, i wasn’t a ’boy’, i was just me……and because i did my job, i was treated well……i didn’t flirt, i didn’t tell jokes, i did my job and cared about the people-men-i worked with and for…….

i guess what i’m trying to say that out of the one side of people’s mouths come these proclomations about feminists and outta the other side they’re using sexist terms to describe themselves or their daughters……so, noone’s clean here, to me, this is no worse than what some men shovel out…….just sayin’ if it is to progress we need to pay attention to what we are projecting ourselves. that’s all.

Carry on the discussion as long as you please, before it all vanishes into the Evil Parallel Universe….

Good evening!

My cousin’s husband — ex-AF officer, hardass, and all of 5′3″ and possessed of a severe case of short man’s syndrome, took note of the fact that my husband (6′+, 250, darkens doors) preferred hanging out in the kitchen with the women to watching the game with the guys.

“What’s the matter? You gay?”

“What’s the matter? You stupid?”

The grudge has been lasting.