whoopiVia Jezebel, we hear that Righty harridan Laura Ingraham was talking smack about how she was going to go on “The View” and tell those librul bitchez where they could stick it.

About a month ago on her radio show, she discussed her upcoming View appearance and talked a big game, saying, “It’s not gonna be pretty.” (To which her nauseating male sidekick said, “When I think of The View, I never think of pretty anyway — except for Elisabeth.” Ugh!) Laura also said she was gonna “go after” Joy if she tried any of “her tricks.”

Except, you know, it didn’t really go like that.

I wanted to embed the clip, but it looks like you’re going to have to go over the Jezebel to watch it. (There are worse places you could end up!) It’s worth the trip.

Jez:

Except Joy did bring up a great example of Laura being a hypocrite, and instead of “going after her,” Laura totally pussied out and dodged around the question. So she was right. It wasn’t pretty!

No, indeedy, it wasn’t. My favorite bit was when Whoopi Goldberg patiently and politely (but very firmly) gave Ingraham a history lesson about the Black Panthers and the title of Ingraham’s book.  Ingraham, who after six years of the Bush presidency and more than a decade of Republican hegemony is still operating under the illusion that conservatives are somehow the pitifully persecuted scapegoats of the USA.

In fact, the show was kind of a bloodbath. Hurrah! People like Ingraham remind me of that bit in Van Halen’s “Behind the Music” when David Lee Roth was so wasted that he bet a guy $500 that if he jumped out the window (many floors up), he could fly, and then jumped. That’s what happens when you’re a fairly mediocre individual who’s living in a hermetically sealed environment were everyone tells him he’s a god.  He gets fucked up and thinks he can fly.  Just like in her radio studio, Laura Ingraham thinks she’s the smartest, toughest pundit out there.

And then she goes on The View and gets her ass served to her on a pizza by Whoopi Goldberg and Joy Behar.

Poor Ingraham is forced into retreat and ends up talking about her (butt-ugly) purple dress from H&M.

“Red State America and Blue State America,” she says, “Coming together in my dress.”

I had to back that up, because I thought she said, “Coming together on my dress.”  And I thought, “Isn’t that kind of what got Monica Lewinsky in so much trouble?”

Get the black light.  It may be a long night.

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