malkin lays an egg(darkblack did it!)

I’m a little concerned about Our Lady of the Concentration Camps. Now that she’s been fired (or resigned, whatever) from The O’Reilly Factor, she’s going to have some extra time on her hands.

So, in the spirit of comity and intra-blog civility, I thought I would maybe quickly whip up a batch of suggestions for Top Ten New Jobs for Stalkin’ Malkin:

10. She and her boy-toy Big Brain Bryan of the Shiny Shirts could recruit a rhythm section, shave their heads, and take their “musical” act on the road and call themselves The Four Skins or something.

9. Cocktail waitress for the next NRO cruise.

8. “Minutemen” camp follower.

7. Cat food taster. (Just cos it’s icky.)

6. Weather Girl. (Given her track record of being exactly 180 degrees wrong on every issue, we could have her do the weather and whatever she says, we will know that the opposite is true.)

5. Personal foot masseuse to Jamil Hussein.

4. Music critic. (See No. 6.)

3. Verifier of whether or not teen girls who sit out recess at the local junior high are telling the truth when they claim to be on their periods.

2. Insurance company snoop. (Like, obvs, yo.)

1. Person at Costco who knocks down and kicks the people who park in the handicapped spots to make absolutely sure they’re not a bunch of big fakers.

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