Flag Butt guyIt was yet another exhilarating week in America. I’m sure you were all as uplifted as I was.

How heartening to learn, for instance, that the upper chamber of our national legislature is not remotely afraid to Unite in Strength to confront what is without doubt the most deadly threat now faced by Our Union: newspaper advertisements that might perhaps hurt one of our brave generals’ feelings. Habeas Corpus, Shmabeus Shmorpus. Giving American troops a break from the meatgrinder: unimportant. Ending a war that the overwhelming majority of Americans despise and that has left a million people dead who were intended to be “liberated,” and has left many millions more refugees in hideous circumstances: BO-RING!

If The United States is indeed an Experiment in the Wonders of Representative Democracy, I’m about ready to suggest that we try it again, only this time without all the damn hydrochloric acid dumped into the beaker.

I myself began the week by exercising my rights and indeed duties as a citizen, by participating in the march against the war in our nation’s capital last Saturday. It was kind of fun, and you can read about our adventures here, if you are so inclined. I don’t think we stopped the war, but what the hell, it was worth it. I got the picture over there in the corner, for instance. And yeah, it’s exactly what it looks like. That’s an old guy with a cigarette, cell phone, Uncle Sam hat… and a flag down his pants.

I repeat. This is a photograph of a guy with a flag sticking out of his ass. Sort of sums up the week, somehow.

I’m just glad there was a breeze. Otherwise I might have had to see him wagging that star-spangled stuff to make it flutter.

Anyway, what I’m saying is, this last week stank. But it was enlivened by this bit of joy from St. Rudy of the Towers, where he attempts to explain to the NRA his evolving views on gun control:

“I believe that law enforcement should focus on enforcing the laws that exist on the books as opposed to passing new extensions of laws,” Mr. Giuliani said. He added that his views have been shaped by his time as a prosecutor, mayor and even by Sept. 11, which he said, “puts a whole different emphasis on what America has to do to protect itself.”

At least the guy in the photo only flies Old Glory out his back porch. Rudy Giuliani has been bulging 9/11 of all things into his trousers for years, like he thinks the whole point of that day was to protrude like his own private personal zucchini stuffed in a sweatsock. “9/11 made me rethink gun control!” Wanker. Horrible, shallow, unthinking, soulless, opportunistic, buzzard-assed Nosferatu-looking swine. Never mind the corpses, here’s Giuliani.

Of all the GOP candidates, my contempt for Rudy is by far the most frigid & boundless. And that’s going some.