Have you noticed how often these people’s idea of “good clean fun” involves ruthless mockery of those they see as their inferiors?

you say that with such enthusiasm,

dude, did it give you a chubby just thinking about the man?…

There is only one question to ask Tweety: “Why do you want to suck Fred Thompson’s cock?”

This is a perfectly serious question.

Now that same-sex marraige is safe in Massachusetts maybe Tweety can get Thompson to dump the wife and marry him. Can’t you just see Thompson running as the first gay candidate for POTUS with Tweety as First Boyfriend?

Morning David!

This is a perfectly serious question.

Now that same-sex marraige is safe in Massachusetts maybe Tweety can get Thompson to dump the wife and marry him. Can’t you just see Thompson running as the first gay candidate for POTUS with Tweety as First Boyfriend?

Eee-ew.

Like Bubble Boy’s “manly” sock-in-the-crotch.

There’s something really wrong with these people.

Well, let’s look at the situation.

The Republicans have a bench of potential nominees that even the Republicans can’t stomach. Everyone is looking at Romni, Guilliani and McCain in incredulity, with Democrats saying “Thank you, God.” and Republicans saying “Oh. My. God!”

When the best person on stage is an ancient crackpot Obstetrician (from the Texas Congressional District next to that of the disgraced Tom DeLay )whose claim to fame is a strong following among anti-government Libertarians and who is famous for regularly voting against the entire House of Representatives on basic things like the military budget, the phrase “Houston, we have a problem.” takes on all new level of meaning to Republicans and conservatives.

But all is not lost. There is, hidden somewhere deep in the Tennessee woods, a lobbyist, actor, one-term do-nothing ex-Senator with no significant credentials or accomplishments beyond appearing old and gruff. He is not known for standing for anything of any kind politically, and beyond being elected to the Senate during the Republican landslide of 1994, has zero political accomplishments. OK. Positive side – think “Political blank slate”. And he does have that tiny, perky little trophy wife about half his age with the cute giggle. Compared to the current potential Republican dwarves, that’s a real positive.

Of course, he makes depressed basset hounds look positively attractive, but who else is there. How do the Republican flacks repackage this utter political vacuum into someone desperate Republicans can vote for??

Well, how does he smell? Is it manly enough? That’s what Chris Mathews is trying out. And why shouldn’t he? Matthews has no reputation to protect, and he is as desperate as the rest of the Republicans to find someone or something better than the current crop of potential nominees.

If FOX can’t somehow use the do-nothing cradle-robbing ex-Senator into a viable candidate who makes Republicans’ hearts go pitty-pat (NO! Keep him away from Dick Cheney until after his surgery next Summer!) they may be forced to pull a wooden or fiberglass puppet out of the closet from somewhere. Then Chris Matthews will be lauding the beauty of his hinges while his handles whisper into his earmike (don’t speak of the pretty strings!)

The lobbyist-actor Thompson with the remarkably unmanly name “Fred” is really the best they have. Expect to see the Wurlitzer to push him as hard as they can.

Can you smell the English leather on this guy, the Aqua Velva, the sort of mature man’s shaving cream, or whatever, you know, after he shaved?

Nah, that’s just old man smell.

Seriously, can we have all the candidates wear beauty pageant sashes when they appear in public? But, let’s forego the swimsuit competition–could get rather ugly.

Now, back to Miss Tennessee…

- Tom