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"Is it irresponsible to speculate? It is irresponsible not to." -- Peggy Noonan, Maureen Dowd's spiritual advisor
The Harpy stared at the bottles lined up in front of her like a glass menagerie. They were cold comfort, to be sure, but they were the only company she had now that she'd driven away everyone else in her life: The men, with her shrewishness and backstabbing; the women, with her Queen-Bee-ism and backstabbing.
She looked at the bottles, and then she looked at her face in the mirror -- in her near-complete lack of self-awareness, she blamed her advancing age and not her nasty untrustworthiness for her lonely state.
And then she looked at her computer keyboard.
A smile twisted its way onto The Harpy's lips, thinned by decades of bitterness. She knew just the thing to make her feel better.
John Edwards was handsome, a self-made rich man, and by all accounts kind, decent, intelligent and a good father. The sort of man The Harpy would have wanted to father her own children, which would never happen now.
So of course she had to see if she could destroy him.
Taking a page from the GOP's history of slime tricks, she decided on a variant of the old "Clinton got a $200 haircut!" fake scandal of 1993, and applied it to John Edwards, who had recently got a $400 haircut, as being evidence of something -- well, what, she couldn't exactly say flat-out without giving away her agenda.
Never mind that Laura Bush paid $700 -- nearly twice as much -- for a haircut in 2005.
Never mind that to be president, the economic dictates of the game require you to be a multimillionaire or have plenty of multimillionaire friends.
Never mind that she, a self-professed femininst and independent woman, was undermining feminism by a) implying that not looking like an utter slob somehow made John Edwards feminine and b) implying as a corrollary that being 'feminine' was to be despised in both men and women.
None of that would stand in The Harpy's need to fill the void in her heart with the bleeding, gasping kill of yet another victim.
She typed away merrily, inserting the talking points so kindly supplied her by the Republicans, and hit "send" in a rush of exhilaration.
The exhilaration lasted about fifteen seconds. And the void was still there.
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Hi PW!
FDL Rocks!!
You forgot to make fun of her lisp.
PHOENIX WOMAN !
a little EPU housekeeping before I read your post
hey firedogs - so very sorry I missed the HRC thread although it was so heartening to read y’all’s great questions on the topic - and all that civility !
my oh my Ms Hamsher :)
LS,
where generally in the Hill Country are you ? are you aware of how many firedogs there are in Central Texas ? there’s a San Marcos/San Antonio cell, but there’s probably a dozen of us north of Austin as well
now for some PW goodness . . .
And what of the Huffington Enquirer???
buzz cuts for jeebus!
I can just hear MoDo cackling “I’ll get you, my pretty! And your $400 haircut, too!”
I’d rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy.
Whats with Modo anyway?
She not gettin’ any?
Kucinich’s Cheney Impeachment bill was #333, today there are 3,333 listed killed…
Ironic…
I think it was foolish for Edwards to pay for the haircuts out of his campaign funds. He should have paid for them out of pocket & avoided what he had to know would be an embarassment. Bad judgement on his part.
JEP @ 9
Good things they all weren’t 6s.
I just called Dennis K’s office to say I support his move today to Impeach Cheney.
It feels good to be a number on the list of people who support his position.
I know, Bob Seeger said I’m Not A Number. And, I agree with that sentiment. I’m a human being. But, sometimes it’s good to be a number. If it means I’m part of that group which opposes what the administration is doing.
how very Hamsherian of you PW :~)
and there’s no Spotlight button for The Harpy, but will do my best to give her a chance to admire your work
eCAHNomics @ 10
I like this take on the whole thing. Or, as TRex would write, ATTACK ATTACK ATTACK!!!
Shorter MoDo:
The Democrats are the Mommy party. Bad mommy! Bad!
The Republicans are the Daddy party. Ooh, spank me daddy! Ooh ooh!
Man, what a day at FDL! And now PW!
Sam Waterston is on CNN playing Ralph Nader meets Joe Lieberman.
I think you are missing the point of the entire article. It doesn’t matter. You fell right into the trap lovey. Don’t play into repiglican talking points.
eCAHNomics says:
April 24th, 2007 at 4:40 pm
I think it was foolish for Edwards to pay for the haircuts out of his campaign funds. He should have paid for them out of pocket & avoided what he had to know would be an embarassment. Bad judgement on his part.
eCAHNomics @
10
Campaign staffer error, to be sure. Rookie mistake to submit that receipt to the campaign. In the hustle-bustle of a Presidential campaign, I doubt it was Edwards’ error. Probably his “body-man” turned it in. But it played into the GOP narrative, to be sure. Not what I’d call a deal-breaker when choosing who to back (disclosure: I’ve made a choice, and it’s Elizabeth’s husband)
ifthethunderdontgetya @ 15
ok, that had me laughing
Dover Bitch @ 14
There are two separate issues here.
1. I think they found out about his haircuts because they were listed on his public campaign documents. If he’d paid for them out of his own funds & not charged them to his campaign, then this wouldn’t have been an issue in the first place. Since any not-too-dumb-to-live D knows that the Rs are attack dogs, then they ought to avoid simple stuff that Rs can exploit. Choose your battles, and don’t choose $400 haircuts.
2. What Ds should say once they get attacked. Of course, attack back. It’s the fact that Ds didn’t that drove me to distraction during the first 6 W years.
Harpy thinks like it’s still the 50’s and Dad comes home after working hard. Mom has a nice meal cooked and everybody is soooo happy. Gee. Haircuts are $.50.
OT but current - PFC Jessica Lynch in congressional testimony today: “I’m still confused as to why they chose to lie”
LIE. Oops.
I sometimes like MoDo’s columns but I couldn’t get through more than 3 chapters of her book. I thought “if that was my life, I’d shoot myself.” That kind of vapid girly perspective comes through in columns like this. Nothing wrong with girlyness, but the brand she’s peddling often seems a bit soulless.
Somerby has MoDo down: She thinks no one want to read about health car. She’s all about “let them eat cake.”
So let’s just refer to her as Maureen Antoinette.
Besides, if you spent any time at watertiger’s looking at President Bush’s haircuts, you’d WANT our next President to get $400 haircuts.
Dude doesn’t even trim his dense, dark earfur.
TeddySanFran,
You’re the first around these parts to come out with their decision. EDWARDS! Far as I know, you’re the first to commit in Leftblogistan.
eCAHNomics @ 10
Top of the head guess — and it’s just a guess — is that once a candidate hits the trail, he or she is not the person managing which budget lines are paying for which expenses.
(That said, I agree with you wholeheartedly.)
For an excellent read on the fog of primary campaigning, I recommend Richard Ben Cramer’s “What It Takes: The Way to White House.” Cramer chronicles the minutiae of life on the 1988 presidential campaign trail for Bush, Dole, Hart, Biden, Gephardt and Dukakis — showing along the way how easy it is amid all the din to make a small misstep that tanks a campaign.
To draw a nice, sharp contrast between Dowd who writes trivial trash, and Gary Kamiya of Salon who writes substance and actually thinks, please spend 5 minutes reading this article. Watch an ad to get in. Well worth the price of admission.
Gary Kamiya on Iraq and VT
Bustednuckles @
8
The harpy works for an effeminate publisher whose $400 cuts on the road are legendary. She oughta try some blogger meat. Might cut through the brainlock.
(Honestie in journalism. For the record, a friend of mine ran for president, and we used every available fund to pretty him up, but then he was a pig.)
Bustednuckles @ 8
I wasn’t there, but I recall some mention of her not getting a fawning hero’s welcome at YearlyKos. maybe she never got over that.
I am kinda confused. Who or what is a harpy?
Holy shit! David Igelais (sp) is giving a great
interview on Hard Balls…
He’s telling the truth…
I was so impressed with his answers…
punaise @
31
To be fair, she’s a powerful motivating force for a lot of people in our base, including many friends of mine. I’m afraid we’re kind of stuck with her.
Totally exasperated, I wrote her a letter after this column and I said “Why don’t you write about anything important? Even my stupid friends don’t read you anymore.”
[With love and apologies to my stupid friends]
cbl @
4
I’m right on the border of Driftwood and Wimberley. We’re Nighbors!!
Bay State Librul @ 33
Yeah - he is kicking ass. He will be lead downfall.
Bay State Librul @ 33
Hard Balls! Are you the first to call it that or have I been missing out? Either way, LOVE IT.
Bay State Librul @ 33
Yep. Just accused the admin of violating the Hatch Act. Hehe. Along with the admin’s very own war hero, Jessica Lynch, calling out the same as deliberate liars, it’s a good day.
John Edwards probably goes to an expensive hair stylist. He is after all a gazillionaire. He probably pays oh - $150 to $200 for a regular inhouse cut. The stylist doubles the rates for a house call. This is normal. I just cannot see John sitting in the waiting room at SuperCuts in the local mall.
MoDo is just too clever for her own good. And I think she is a bi*ch.
Loo Hoo @ 27
Oh, no, there’s lotsa partisans at DK and MyDD — for lotsa candidates. Here too, I think. We’ll be chatting about this campaign for a while; I don’t want to defend (or criticize) any candidate without declaring my preference. We have a swell field this year; take it from someone who remembers 1988. And 1968, for that matter.
On the other hand, I knew MoDo was a class-betraying harpy as soon as I heard she was an email-pal of Poppy Bush’s. So I wasn’t surprised — and won’t be further surprised — by her attacks on Democrats.
Who you leaning to, Loo Hoo?
Damn, no Keith. Is he off all week?
Kass: I believe a harpy is a mythological creature…half bird, half woman, all rapacious and generally no fun.
mrsmarks @28
” tanks a campaign.”
Funny.
CD @ 43
I am still confuzled but now flapping my wings for some reason. Chrip.
it’s her M.O.: Modo: sop, err, randy.
Tweety calling on whistleblowers…well blow me down! He just said re: Rove using the RNC communications back and forth, “I wonder if that isn’t his M.O.” I do declare!
TeddySanFran @
42
Frankly I can do without seeing his face for a week. He needs some downtime after his positively tactless VTech performance last week.
A’57 @ 44
Har! Ya got me there.
SnarKassandra @ 32
Cassie, use the google, and you’ll find Greek mythology mixed with the Shakespeare. Has something to do with a particular kind of woman. I didn’t know what a harpy was until i, well, got old.
eCAHNomics @ 10
do you really think that John Edwards sits down and writes checks each evening for bills presented to his campaign headquarters?
i don’t think he does.
didn’t he pay for these from his personal income once he discovered (via the scandelous MSM) what happened? i don’t think a haircut would have been brought to his attention for financial disposition before the scandal.
maureen dowd and others have bones to pick, and they can’t find bones suitable for a presidential debate/policy/position.
i’m not sure why, but i expected better of her choices.
as far as i’m concerned, JRE is the only candidate speaking out about how he may create policy regarding issues i care about. certainly, not all issues. but many more than the others currently running for the democratic ticket.
eCAHNomics, the thrust of that blog post, and of my comments here, is that the minutia of the “gaffe” is irrelevant. The right-wing attack is both baseless and inevitable.
If they will attack Edwards no matter what he does, then it doesn’t really matter if he made it a little easier for them. What matters is how hard he body-slams them when they open their traps.
I’m still waiting for that kind of response. I asked Clinton earlier if the Democrats have the fortitude to undo all the damage to our government that the Bush administration has caused from top to bottom. I think she does. I don’t know about some of these other candidates and when I ask them the same question, I will not ask if they think the Dems have the fortitude, I will ask why should I believe you have the fortitude.
cbl @
4
And the San Antone cell is plotting coup. Or at least a pup party at Gruene Hall for the July Gospel Brunch with a Texas Twist.
Anyone ever read, “Women Who Run with the Wolves”?
Ha, ha!!! Wild woman!
punaise @ 46
beautiful!
Even though there’s no Keith they are leading with the Tillman story. I could not drag myself away from my computer this afternoon. Stunning testimony
Helen @ 56
Truth hertz!
Seems David Iglesias is behind the Rover inquiry.
punaise @ 46
I want no mo’ of MoDo’s M.O., d’oh.
Helen @ 56
Yeah, the wingnuts’ response has been interesting, too.
Legal question:
Since Waxman asked or subpoened the RNC stuff first, if the WH tries to say that “their” investigation is more important. Which demand for records trumps which?
TeddySanFran @
26
I’m bald and I can’t get decent haircuts for $10 (which is prolly what der Chimpy pays). If I actually HAD hair, I think I would be willing to pay a bit more. Which is why NOBODY but ME touches the ‘Stache! :})
ifthethunderdontgetya @ 15
Now Junior, you need to put your Page costume on first….
LS @ 57
Megahertz.
Kevin Tillman will not rest until he knows the truth!
LS @ 61
The whitehouse is using this special investigation as a big road block.
Mary McCurnin @ 66
But can they override Congressional inquiry at this point in time?
dakine01 @ 53
I could say something about that being preferable to Cheney
pooping a clot, but that would be unkind, so I won’t.CD @ 43
You forgot drop dead ugly.
who cuts bush’s hair?
how much?
rove’s?
cheney’s?
any decent self respecting journalist would ask these hard hitting questions
SnarKassandra @
32
Cassie, ya need to pick you up a copy of either Edith Hamilton’s Mythology or Bulfinches’ Age of Fable. Both are fun reads and cover most of the Greek Gods and Godesses.
BTW, good questions this afternoon for the Senator.
LS @ 61
Since they can make multiple copies it doesn’t make sense only one can look.
But then, nothing the GOopers do makes sense anymore.
I refuse to believe that Bush, Rove, Rice and Rumsfeld didn’t know about the Tillman coverup.
And I don’t want to get started on Dowd. Yet.
wtf @ 70
They outsource it to Halliburton, so…ding da da ding ding…that would be $35,000…
MoDofo must have been a seriously unpopular teenager who became a reasonably attractive woman and is still paying back all the guys who said she was ugly in high school. Nooners is just bat sh-t crazy -still trying to figure out a way into either the Pope’s crypt or ronnie raygun’s
wtf @ 70
Bush probably uses a chainsaw when he’s in Crawford. Just sayin’
you know, if i could afford a 400 haircut i would try one; just to see what it’s like … there’s no shame in that
the shame is republican corporate welfare for thieving corporations and shredding the safety net for the poor the ill and the aged
Crazy Horse @ 50
Speaking of Shakespeare, anyone catch one of our Representatives today cite the Bard’s famous line: “Oh! what a tangled web we weave: When first we practice to deceive!”? *g*
wtf @ 70
If I recall correctly, plenty of that charge was for tv makeup. And all of those republicans also get made up for tv…shrub, every single time.
The whole attack is as bogus that on Gore’s brown suit…also spearheaded by MoDo. (She can’t be teh shrieking harpy, because there can be only one.)
Somewhat off-topic. The artwork isn’t darkblack’s oeurve, but this is pretty good.
ls@78
a chainsaw for a haircut
gosh what if there’s an accident …
Mary McCurnin @
40
I heard John explain the haircut thing on Ed Shultz. He said he was embarrassed at the incident but that the bill for haircuts was sent to his campaign not him. The way he explained it, haircuts have to be gotten by calling a hair person in, as there is no time for going out for a cut. He said he knew his haircut would be expensive but he was horrified at the price.
Do not feed the trolls.
Do not feed the trolls.
Do not feed the trolls. . . . .
Props to David Iglesias, fired USAtty, Republican-American, who has appealed to a special counsel about KKKRove violation of Hatch Act.
Props to all Republican-Americans who are beginning to see the light.
wtf @ 78
Actually, some of the best haircuts I’ve ever had were from a salon in the town I lived outside Albany, NY. And they were half price cuz bald men only had half the hair. :})
Dover Bitch @ 52
I understood your point & agree.
As for haircuts, get mine done at Kenneth’s at the Waldorf Astoria, though not by Kenneth himself. Just went above $100. So $400 sounds pretty dear to me.
punaise @ 68
Given his age, and his general demeanor, we know he has no trouble clotting a poop….
wtf @ 70
They have searched their memories and they cannot remember recalling where they got haircuts. The haircuts are on their calendar, so they concede they got them, but where when how and how much, they just can’t recall.
Why would MoDo launch a snarky little torpedo like that anyway? I could understand Coulter, but why Dowd?
Are we really expected to take this in (White) house (Special Counsel) investigation of Rove seriously?
punaise @ 46
top ten, p.
Jessica is the straw
Jessica is the straw
Jessica is the straw
thx TSF!
Aaahhh
ifthethunderdontgetya @ 80
That would explain everything-both why the charge was so high & why he charged it to campaign account. I must admit I didn’t read articles on this subject with any care, but don’t recall seeing it mentioned before.
Oklahoma kiddo @ 91
If it somehow enables the WH to block our ability to get at the truth, it has to be taken seriously.
RonD @ 90
As I’ve certainly said before, she really doesn’t like anyone. And, she’s perfect for the Washington gossip beat. She’s got the disposition of Hedda Hopper with a yeast infection.
eCAHNomics @ 87
I get $30 for a women’s shampoo cut and blowdry in East Central Florida.
Is Kenneth still living? He must be a very old fellow.
TSF,
I’m not committing yet, but I do like Edwards a lot. He’s taking stands that I like on really important issues. Coming out early on issues like Iraq, healthcare and Fox is delightful. Elizabeth is a real asset too.
I do think Hillary has a real asset in Bill, though. I think she cares about America and our standing world-wide. Bill would be a rock star ambassador that could repair our damaged image more quickly than anyone else, I think.
I do not like her stand on the war, and thought she would have been well-served to keep her thoughts to herself about those of us wanting the war to end to vote for someone else. Hillary is brilliant, and I would like to see a woman in the White House instead of another white male. That said, she needs to earn my trust back.
Barack Obama seems too much like a preacher to me at this point. I don’t want anybody preaching at me, we’ve had enough of that to last a lifetime.
Richardson is certainly qualified, but I don’t know enough about him. I want to hear more.
montag @ 98
HAAAAAA!!!!!
I am suddenly feeling itchy.
hackworth @ 98
Yes, he’s still around. Seems like a nice, calm older man.
Hugh @
80
Hugh - didn’t Sir Walter Scott write that famous line??
Alison used the word “allegedly” to describe whether the GAO presentation was to help the GOP candidates.
Dear, the GAO Administrator testified under oath about the meeting where the Powerpoint exhibit was shown, and the exhibit was admitted as part of a sworn hearing. There’s no “allegedly” about it.
Fineman wonders if the OSC/WH investigation is to shut Waxman down.
TeddySanFran @ 105
jathink?
DSPinPW @ 76
Shorter DSPinPW: Look! An obvious distraction!
Speaking of Distractions…how much does 370 days of Bush vacations cost us the taxpayer?
eCAHNomics @
10
eCAHNomics, see Snowbird at 83. Aso note that this was not just a haircut but also makeup for a video shoot too. When I first saw this story, my initial reaction was anger at Edwards poor judgment and to think, gee that’s where my donation is going. Then I dug a little deeper and realized this is just one more example of how the press loves to jump on us and on how we all need to make dealing with that one of our top priorities.
We need to respond to their eagerness to trash and also their unwillingness to do anything but look at campaigns as horse races. Edwards has so much to say and all they report is his haircut.
So PW: Thanks for a great service. This is a blog I’ve been meaning to write for a while now!
Stephen Parrish, CPA @ 103
Yes, he did, but no one bothered to tell the Representative that.
hackworth @ 73
Heck with the haircut. I’ll happily give John Edwards a backrub.
I don’t know if its been mentioned here, but I hadn’t thought about what Howard just said on Countdown. That the “special counsel” investigation could be a way to not have to testify cooperate with Waxman. Dang, I’m such a Pollyanna!
Mary McCurnin @ 102
Ya know, Mary, I was gonna tell you re: your 101; if you are really a girl you should not be joking about yeast infections!! ;)
TeddySanFran @ 105
Umm, Fineman wonders about a great deal. Too bad he’s short on memory. While this may be the intent of the WH, there’s precedent in the Watergate, Iran-Contra and BCCI investigations–both the prosecutors and Congress worked in tandem at one point in time or another on those.
TeddySanFran @ 106
You definitely need to be a Newsweak columnist to figure that one out.
Thanks for the intel, Howie.
Oklahoma kiddo @ 92
No. This has been another edition of simple answers to simple questions.
Get Rove and you’ve got the other two…
Fineman on Olbermann says in order for Rove to be criminally prosecuted under the Hatch Act Rove’s actions have “to be rally brazen”. Rove. Brazen? Get a grip Fineman. This whole administration is nothing if not brazen.