monkeybone1.jpg

[image grabbed from "2001: Space Odyssey"] 

for the week ending 2/24/07:

I knew that at some point, Western Civilization was going to fall down and go boom; I just didn't think it was going to be in quite so sleazy a fashion as this, in a misty, money-colored haze of crocodile tears, spiderwebs of lies, and silicone injections. I, for one, welcome our weapon-wielding female chimpanzee overlords.  They're just in it for the food.  At least for now.

Who knew where to turn first last week? Pleading with the jury to "give him back to me!", Ted Wells went all "La Traviata" on our kiesters during the Libby trial summations, turning the trial into a Lifetime made-for-television movie. Dick Cheney gathered up his henchmen and cleared out of Dodge just in case the Libby jury came back with a guilty verdict. How do you like Cheney's brand of loyalty now, Scooter?Not to be outdone by Wells' theatrics, the judge in the uber-bizarro battle for Anna Nicole Smith's decomposing remains wept and rambled and mugged for the cameras, turning the custody hearing into an audition tape for the next Fox reality show (now THAT'S something for a judge to aspire to!). Fox's favorite yokel, the President, turned the "hick" factor up to 11 when he went to Tennessee to shill for his DOA health care plan and then tried to huff a beaker of ethanol, just like the good old days.

Oh, yeah, Britney Spears had a major freakout, while Prince Harry, who knows a thing or two about partying, suited up to serve his country to Iraq . . . unlike two other princess wannabes whose last name sounds like "Tush".

Now if someone can hand me that branch – I have to go find an anthill for lunch. 

*** 

James Wolcott leads off with a scathing slapdown of the Fox Noise machine's public urination on veterans (I know, I know – Christy linked to this already, but it's THAT good).

Once again, Sir Holden the Courageous at First Draft braves losing cellphone service in the synaptic dead zone that is our President's brain.

Dick Cheney rattles his flaccid sabre at China? Oliver Willis says, "No. Stop. You're killing me." Cheney's trip to Japan reminds Rising Hegemon's Attaturk of another famous Tokyo visitor.

Carl at Simply Left Behind applauds Prince Harry for being duty-bound.  Too bad all the war cheerleaders here can't summon that courage. Color Outside the Tent's Clif slack-jawed at Senator Jeff "Do Not Seek the Tray-zhur!" Sessions' argument for staying in Iraq. And The Editors at The Poor Man Institute provides a handy guide to keep yourselves up to date on the Coalition of the Killing.

General J.C. Christian writes a letter to the NYU Young Republicans and Jon Swift rounds up the predictable wingnut response to Dana Priest's WaPo article about the despicable conditions at Walter Reed.

Paddy at Cliff Schecter's place has a few thoughts on MSNBC's 24 hour coverage of the Anna Nicole Smith trial.  And I mean choice.

The execrable writings of The Doughy Pantload suffer a savaging by the pen (keyboard, whatever) of World O' Crap's Scott, while TBogg cuts in line at the Wingnut Smorgasbord.  

Quiddity at uggabugga has a sneak peek at the next New York Post opinion poll. 

Oh, dear. Gavin at Sadly, No! has discovered Conservapedia, the wingnut version of Wikipedia.  Heaven forgend their beautiful minds be sullied with facts. UPDATE: Sadly, No! seems to be suffering a DOS attack – check out the mucho estupido Conservapedia at SteveAudio's crib.

The Rude Pundit manages a feat I never thought I'd see: the names "McCain" and "Martha Graham" in the same sentence.

Scrutiny Hooligans' Syntax has found the most accurate and reliable flowchart I've seen to date.

Tengrain at Mock, Paper, Scissors owes me a new keyboard. 

d at Lawyers, Guns, and Money wishes Bill Frist a happy birthday. 

Harry Hutton at Chase Me, Ladies, I'm in the Cavalry explains how Aussie P.M. John Howard got his job. 

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