suck, faithful one

(Fig 1-A: John Gibson's official GOP kneepads) 

You know, I've never really understood why we call Chris Matthews "Tweety" when Fox News pundit John Gibson so much more clearly resembles the canary in question.

To wit:

 tweety bird

Tweety Bird.

gibson

John Gibson 

Note the similarities in their large, yellow, egg-shaped heads.  Not to mention the matching expressions of vacuous piety.  Yes, I do believe these two were separated at birth.  And clearly, Tweety got all the brains in the equation.  Seriously.  I mean, have you heard what Gibson's been saying about Barack Obama lately?

See, it started (surprise!) with a typically enlightened segment on "Fox and Friends":

This morning, Fox News featured a segment highlighting a right-wing report that Sen. Barack Obama (D-IL) attended an Islamic “madrassa” school as a 6-year-old child.

Fox & Friends host Steve Doocy pointed out that madrassas are “financed by Saudis” and “teach this Wahhabism which pretty much hates us,” then declared, “The big question is: was that on the curriculum back then?” Later, a caller to the show questioned whether Obama’s schooling means that “maybe he doesn’t consider terrorists the enemy.” Fox anchor Brian Kilmeade responded, “Well, we’ll see about that.”

The Fox hosts failed to correct the false claim that Obama is Muslim. One caller, referring to Obama, said, “I think a Muslim would be fine in the presidency, better than Hillary. At least you know what the Muslims are up to.” Anchor Gretchen Carlson responded, “We want to be clear, too, that this isn’t all Muslims, of course, we would only be concerned about the kind that want to blow us up.” Obama is Christian, a member of Chicago’s Trinity United Church of Christ since 1988.

Of course, when you've been taught everything you know about world history and other cultures by Pox News, it's not so hard to make the leap to thinking that no matter what his current religious and spiritual affiliations, if Obama even read two or three lines from the Koran, the insidious homicidal programming that determines the actions of all Muslims must have had some kind of effect on him. 

How do we know that if he's elected to office he won't get some kind of cryptic phone call in the middle of the night that activates the secret subconscious programming instilled in him by the dastardly Imams who run that Islamic school?  I mean, picture it.

SCENE: The Presidential Living Quarters, 3:30am. 

Telephone: Rrrrrring!  Rrrrrrring!

Mrs. Obama: Who could that be at this hour?

Barack: I'll get it.  Hello?

Muffled Voice: Have you looked up at the crescent moon, lately, Mr. President?  (click!)

Barack (eyes rolled back in head): ALLAH AKBAR!!  DEATH TO AMERICA!! 

Mrs. Obama: Honey, are you alright?  Who was that?!

Barack: I'm fine, darling, I just need to go call in a nuclear strike on every major city in the heartland.  It's my duty as a servant of Allah!  DEATH TO AMERICA!! 

It could happen!  You laugh, now, you terrorist-loving liberals!  But you can't handle the truth! 

Okay, well, actually CNN told the truth about this aspect of Obama's past: 

Commenting on this report today, Wolf Blitzer said that CNN had done “what any serious news organization is supposed to do in this kind of a situation”: actually investigate and learn the facts. CNN’s Senior International Correspondent John Vause filed a report from Indonesia. Watch it.

In the report, Vause says, “I’ve been to those madrassas in Pakistan … this school is nothing like that.” He also interviews a classmate of Obama’s who says the school was not even strictly Muslim; it also taught Christian, Buddhist, and Confucian students.

CNN has more details HERE.

But John Gibson, like any good Fox News drone knows that you should never, ever, ever let the truth ruin a good smear campaign:

On his radio show this week, Gibson refused to back down. He claimed the CNN reporter who debunked the false report “probably went to the very madrassa” as Obama. Gibson implied that CNN’s report had covered up religious extremism at the school:

GIBSON [W]hat did they see when they went to the madrassa where Barack Obama went to school?

HOST: Kids playing volleyball.

GIBSON: Playing volleyball, right. They didn’t see them in any terrorist training camps?

HOST: No.

GIBSON: No. Um, but they probably didn’t show them in their little lessons where they’re bobbing their heads and memorizing the Koran.

HOST: I didn’t see any tape of that, no.

Doesn't matter!  John Gibson's never been to Indonesia, never been to a Muslim school for boys, never even met Barack Obama, but he knows the real danger we face as a nation by electing a black man man with even a drop of Muslim blood to the highest office in the land.  Don't try to confuse him with the facts!  He knows that "truth" and "reality" are just more dirty liberal tricks, and we all know that no filthy, treasonous liberal can love America like John Gibson, so shaddap with your so-called "evidence".  Fox News doesn't need your stinkin' evidence.  That stuff's for commies.