
"Instant karma's gonna get you..."
The last few days have not been kind to Clan Bush (or should that be Klan Bush?). Interestingly, it seems that the entire crooked, shiftless family has been out of the country at once, which has led to a spate of hilarious misadventures for them all.
Yeah, right, don't everybody cry at once.
Let's move from eldest to youngest, shall we?
Poppy Bush took some time away from shepherding the ISG on Monday to give a speech to what he thought would be a sympathetic audience over in the UAE. Things went a little off-message during the Q&A part of the presentation:
The oil-rich Persian Gulf used to be safe territory for former President Bush, who brought Arab leaders together in a coalition that drove Saddam Hussein's troops from Kuwait in 1991. But gratitude for the elder Bush, who served as president from 1989-93, was overshadowed at the conference by hostility toward his son, whose invasion of Iraq and support for Israel are deeply unpopular in the region.
"We do not respect your son. We do not respect what he's doing all over the world," a woman in the audience bluntly told Bush after his speech.
Bush, 82, appeared stunned as others in the audience whooped and whistled in approval.
Guess this wasn't one of those hand-picked crowds of GOP donors and corporate cronies that you folks can order up here in the US, was it? Who let actual citizens into the room? FIRE THEM AT ONCE!!
"This son is not going to back away," Bush said, his voice quivering. "He's not going to change his view because some poll says this or some poll says that, or some heartfelt comments from the lady who feels deeply in her heart about something. You can't be president of the United States and conduct yourself if you're going to cut and run. This is going to work out in Iraq. I understand the anxiety. It's not easy."
Yes, yes, of course, whatever. Dry up, you tedious old one-termer! We've heard this strain of specious bullshit a hundred times before from your kid. "Deciderin' is haaaard work! I don't give a shit what y'all think, anyhow! Only I know what's right for you and the rest of the world! Now y'all shut up and lemme think for a second, godammit!!"
When pressed by an audience member to explain exactly what the plan is for the failed mission in Iraq, Bush 41 replied:
"I have strong opinions on a lot of these things. But the reason I can't voice them is, if I did what you ask me to do — tell you what advice I give my son — that would then be flashed all over the world," Bush said.
"If it happened to deviate one iota, one little inch, from what the president's doing or thinks he ought to be doing, it would be terrible. It'd bring great anxiety not only to him but to his supporters," he added.
In other words, "I know, but I can't tell you. National security 'n' all." Where have we heard this before?
Kind of reminds you why it was such a relief to see Bill Clinton take office in '93, doesn't it?
Meanwhile in Indonesia, thousands and thousands of protestors turned out to hurl epithets, rocks, and garbage at our current Dear Leader. He only stayed in the country for six hours and the Lower Orders were kept at bay by a big fence and a massive security detail.
The president was to spend just six hours in Indonesia, most of it at Bogor Palace, a presidential retreat outside the capital of Jakarta and far from the scene of protests on Sunday where Bush was denounced as a "war criminal" and "terrorist".
Oops. I guess they don't have Pox News in Indonesia to bathe their citizens in a 24-hour mind-numbing gush of pro-Bush eyewash. You'd think Rupert Murdoch would have spotted the hole in the market. Oh, well, what's six hours when you know your next stop is our own Nate of Get in Their Face!'s old stomping grounds, Honolulu? What could possibly go wrong there?
Apparently, plenty:
Though Bush was cheered by troops and others on Oahu — a contrast to the thousands of anti-war demonstrators a day before in Indonesia — his visit wasn't without incident for those around him.
Three police motorcycle officers were injured when they crashed on slick pavement while escorting his motorcade on Tuesday. Two were taken by ambulance to a local hospital, where one was described as in serious condition and another was described as stable.
Ouch.
Also, acting White House Travel Office Director Gregg Pitts was beaten and robbed by at least two men while out in Honolulu Monday night. Pitts suffered head and other injuries in the attack. He was awake and alert but remained behind at a Honolulu hospital because of a possible concussion, White House spokesman Tony Fratto said.
Double ouch. That'll teach him to get all liquored up and start accusing strangers of working for Al Qaeda. Also, perhaps someone should mention to BushCo staff that when you are travelling in a bubble, it's best to remain quietly within the bubble with your seatbelt fastened until the Preznint and his entourage have come to a complete stop. In Washington.
Take for instance what happened to a member of Not-Jenna's security detail in Argentina:
A Secret Service agent on the advance detail got into an "altercation" with someone after a night out and was badly beaten, according to the law enforcement reports. The Secret Service said today the incident was an attempted mugging that occurred while the agent was on his own time. The agent is doing fine.
Sigh. Why do I get the sense that on his "night out" this guy was strutting around down there with his chest all puffed out telling anyone who'd listen what a big BADASS he is and how he works for the SECRET! FUCKING! SERVICE! and he could kill you with his bare hands and blah blah blah de blah...?
If that's the case, I think I'd have bopped him on the head just on general principle. Don't cry for him, Argentina!
The rest of the trip wasn't without incident. Not-Jenna was robbed!
First Daughter Barbara Bush had her purse and cell phone stolen as she had dinner in a restaurant in Buenos Aires, Argentina, even though she was being guarded by a detail of Secret Service agents, according to law enforcement reports made available to ABC News.
For the most (unintentionally) hilarious reaction to this, we have to go to The Political Pit Bull (via Salon's Daou Report):
No harm, no foul, I guess. But this doesn't really bode well for the quality of protection that the twins are getting considering that if someone was able to steal one of their purses, someone probably could have slipped, oh, I don't know, a bomb into it too.
Dude. Step away from the episodes of '24'! Lord knows, though, Buenos Aires could well be swarming with Al Qaeda operatives who never leave home without little home-made bombs that are just the perfect size to slip into Not-Jenna's Chanel clutch. It's what all the hip jihadis are doing this year. (I feel naked without mine!)
Let this be a lesson to you, oh you spawn of robber-baron and Nazi sympathizer great-grampa Prescott Bush! Outside the United States, you don't have the necessary numbers of foot-soldiers and handlers to keep the hoi polloi from exacting their vengeance on your soft, white, privileged backsides. Here you can hand-pick your crowds, shun honest reporters, and play to your coteries of worshipful zombies, but out there beyond our borders, it's another story. Your family and its enablers have robbed, killed, maimed, deceived, and double-crossed enough people that it's no wonder that the vultures of karma are constantly circling, circling, ever-vigilant for the moment when they can swoop down on your unguarded heads.
Is that clear?
Now, anybody want to buy a Chanel clutch and a cell-phone?
UPDATE: Reader rwcole reminds us to bear in mind that this may all be the result of a well-aimed curse by an Indonesian witch-doctor:
An Indonesian man claiming magic powers drank animal and snake blood today as part of a ritual he said would jinx the forthcoming visit of US President George Bush.
Ki Gendeng Pamungkas slit the throat of a goat, a small snake and stabbed a black crow in the chest, mixed their blood with herbs before drinking the potion and smearing it on his face.
“I don’t hate Americans, but I don’t like Bush,” said Pamungkas, adding he believed the ritual would succeed because “the devil is with me today”.
UPDATE 2: How did I miss this?
Air Force One had tyres go flat in Vietnam landing
ReutersMonday, November 20, 2006 21:18 IST
BOGOR/INDONESIA: Air Force One had six tyres go flat on landing in Ho Chi Minh City on Sunday night due to a malfunction of the aircraft's automatic braking system, White House officials said on Monday.
The problem forced the plane's mechanics to scramble to find replacement tyres, nearly forcing US President George W Bush to fly to Indonesia in a back-up aircraft.
Officials said a malfunction in the aircraft's automatic braking system generated sufficient heat to activate a safety feature that blows out tyre valves.
Sheesh. That witch-doctor may be on to something.
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Turkey!
If those stupid white guys had just shot a damned cat instead of a freaking bird, tomorrow we’de all be eating… uhhh, never mind.
They should have shot one of those black birds. Then we could all eat crow.
You know, Trex, you were looking at all those foreign episodes wrong: Nothing like that happens to our precious elite in the good ol’ US of A, so obviously Shrub’s policies are keeping some of us safer at home.
TEEEEEEE—–REXXXXXXX!!!!!!!!
Bushbashing is always more fun when you make it a family affair.
neurophius @ 5
Isn’t it about time for one of Jeb’s kids to go to rehab, yet?
It’s the curse- the witch doc cursed ol Clusterfuck- this is only the beginning.
By the by, it came out a couple of hours ago that the Argentine interior minister confirmed the robbery–although not that it was Not-Jenna who was robbed. An amusing excerpt:
Barbara, 24, was visiting her twin sister, Jenna, who had been in neighboring Paraguay recently in an activity related with the United Nations Children’s Fund, UNICEF, according to Argentine media reports.
Huh? Did the Bush family name the ranch “UNICEF?” And is there some kind of confusion as a result?
TRex!
Not-Jenna’s got a bed at Betty Ford with her
blood alcoholskankiness titresname on it.TRex @6
But TRex, what do you really think? It’s not good to hold things in . . .
rwcole @
7
Oh. I had forgotten all about that. That would have been great to include in the post.
Maybe I should do an update.
Lord knows, though, Buenos Aires could well be swarming with Al Qaeda operatives who never leave home without little home-made bombs that are just the perfect size to slip into Not-Jenna’s Chanel clutch. It’s what all the hip jihadis are doing this year. (I feel naked without mine!)
NSA/FBI knocking on your door yet, TRex?
Oh, it is quiet here. Tis the night before Thanksgiving and all through the house?
There was a silly show on tv down here called “My Name is Earl” about working through karma. I found it gave me some hope about the Bush syndicate eventually getting their just desserts, but I’m also sort of bothered that I won’t be around long enough to read the real backstory about all of this, the elections-stealing, the machinations of their crimes and blackmailing and whatever. I want the satisfaction of seeing the explanations.
In 2000, when I started reading politics on the internet, I mainly read Table Talk on Salon (before the pay Salon). While I was cynical, I thought some of the comments there were a bit wild-eyed. Looking back, they were both prescient and conservative.
MayDaze @ 12
Only if he’s been buyng broccoli.
Post updated above.
Cor, it is quiet tonight. Dang. Have I lost my mojo?
Really, some witch doctor cursed chimpy?! Can we get a link?
Kelven @ 17
will they accept a retainer?
Nope, I think it has something to do with husbands cleaning and wives coming home to find themselves hot for husbands who clean….I was reading something like that earlier on another thread.
Or else, the turkeys have arisen and taken revenge, wanting a little karma of their own.
Dagnabbit, who left the door unlocked so they could sneak back in?
Kelven @ 17
It’s in the update.
Alex at Wonkette has a particularly funny take on it, though.
kirk murphy @ 18
I think the retainer would be a snake, a goat and a crow…
I don’t want to even think about the Bush’s and their spawn at this point. I’m currently a wee bit drunk on some wine and am feeling all kinds of love and nostaglia. I love FDL and read it EVERY DAMN DAY. The writing here is supurb. I hope everyone is feeling peace in their hearts, relief from the elections, and optimism for the new year.
Gotta throw in a word here on one of Poppy’s remarks:
So the fuck what? Dubya and his supporters haven’t hesitated to bring “great anxiety” on the rest of us–that is to say, the other six and a half billion of us. And they haven’t even achieved anything worth achieving as a result. Why the fuck should we care what stress our dissent brings on these weasels?
I don’t think it’s your mojo TRex, it’s last minute Thanksgiving stuff I have no doubt. Personally I am addicted to your snark…
Nope, I think the quiet has something to do with husbands cleaning and wives coming home to find themselves hot for husbands who clean….I was reading something like that earlier on another thread.
Or else, the turkeys have arisen and taken revenge, wanting a little karma of their own.
NZ Expat @ 19
As the only human in my home, I think I’ll double up on the kitty food tonight….
Great stuff TRex. It’s easy to forget that this family considers itself to be royalty.
By the way TRex, did you get the email I sent you called “The Canary is Dead”?
Sorry for my lousy use of the computer and the editing and all that, she says, slinking toward the door.
dannyM @ 23
Aw, we love you, too. Give us a smooch.
Heading home, gang.
See you there.
MayDaze @ 22
wow - my inner EarthFirst!er prolly won’t be contributing.
but you are describing the three faces of chimpy.
Hey Kirk … does the double kitty food work? I may try that here …
my companion tonight is a pup who snores … loudly!
Just saw this on Buckeye State Blog today:
Big Butter Jesus
TRex @
16
I’m trying to cook and check in at the same time. I’d chat more, but really, laughing over the Bush’s woes and cooking is just asking for a spice mishap!
We moved this year an the new house has a fancy bad ass oven with a double throw down fan an “probe”… After three margaritas the instructions look like the recipe for a nuclear generating station.. This fuckin turkey’s gettin stuffed- then probed- the convected… May God forgive us all.
rwcole @ 36
That’s what you get when you invite the Greys over for Thanksgiving.
— THE ITALIANS GOT IT RIGHT. WWII, MUSOLINNI AND A LADY FRIEND — OUT ON A BACK TRAIL — THRU THE MOUNTAINS TO SUPPOSED SAFETY — AND SAW THE WORLD UPSIDE DOWN…UNTIL A HAIL OR ROCKS MADE THAT VERY DIFFICULT… // GREAT BLACK AND WHITE PHOTOS FOR THE STRONG OF GUTS AND NUTS. COME ON KARMA. YOUR STOCK IS ON THE RISE.
“spice and broccoli” not herbs.
http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/.....pe=bondage
Given Poppy’s love of broccoli, I thought that was a nice touch. Does this Ki have a website where we can support his work? It seems effective and far-reaching. I wouldn’t want lack of fundage to stand in Ki’s way.
Siun @ 33
well, the kitties haven’t devoured me yet :)
(’cepting the rare ankle nip on a late morning: three of the kitties are half Maine Coon).
But seriously, every time I double up on the kitty food I sleep really well at first, but after a few hours I’m hungry and have to scratch at the door.
Oh dear.
I think I need to get out more.
we’ve got one part maine coon … he torments the pitbull something fierce …
Goodness. Did Chimpy declare it an enemy combatant or something?
so … did I miss a discussion today about this weird tom hayden iraq tale? just catching up in ICH and that’s a strange one!
DELBERT MATHANEY @
38
Really, there’s no need to shout.
Hey Trex! did you see the video Kit sent over earlier - if not check you mail
I was wondering if I should break out my special powers on the shouting comment but then thought it was oddly poetic
Siun @ 45
The one of David Copperfield’s kitty?
A.
Dorable.
I’m surprised that Poppi Bush is so surprised!
Does he really think his son is so loved?? I woulda thought he woulda heard his kid is a train wreck a LONG time ago…
Well, the turkey’s in the oven and the table set - there is something to be said for being 18 hours ahead of PST. Kirk, Siun I’d happily invite you but I think it would be cold by the time you got here….
Sorry to miss the end of the last thread, there’s a new Food Palace a blockandahalf up Oak on Broderick I had to drag the fiance to. Extraordinary for this neighborhood, a modern version of Fulton Fish Market, and oddly not-Disneyfied. But truly a temple of future consumption — the nearest grocery is ten blocks from here, and nothing like our new emporium. Pretty pretty new new clean, like nothing else in our neighborhood.
Walking around in it, we felt transported, as if we were in Vancouver or Baltimore or Bruxelles or Hanoi: some cool food city, full of fun people lusting over beautifully presented comestibles. Still in shock that it’s so close.
.
This post, dear theropod, is magnificent. I’d hoped you’d get this mid-meltdown summary documented for us tonight, as there’s no floor under this Chernobyl. BushCo is imploding. End of brand.
For those who’ve not seen her new digs, revel in watertiger’s cool new caribbean colours, as well.
http://www.dependablerenegade.com/
NZ Expat - I left you a note at the bottom of last thread, but I suspect it was EPU’d.
Trex -
Loved this bit.
Chimpy’s travel director can’t even find the safe routes in Honolulu.
[Nothing excuses or mimimizes an assault and/or head injury. But if Honolulu is so dangerous, couldn’t they have reassigned not-Jenna’s brawling buff buddy to shadow the hapless travel director on his dangerous rounds?]
As this was a Leadership Conference they must have video taped it. So where’s the youtube?
Its extraordinary that the first hostile question was asked of Bush Snr by a woman in of all places the ME.
Kelven @
17
he said to
“Ooh, ee, ooh ah ah
Ting tang walllah wallah bing bang”
Patrick 4/4 @ 54
Now that takes me back…at a guess 1958?
TeddySanFran @ 39
And fast. I mean Ki does the curse less than a week ago and all this already? What’s it gonna be like when the full whammy hits?
petedownunder @ 55
Before my time.
But we did sing it to the kids constantly.
petedownunder @ 49
petedownunder, I’d happily join you, but i’ve a date with my folks in LA tomorrow.
But i’d be happy to get together for a pint or two on one of your trips to the Bay Area.
Great Post!
The funny thing is though, when I drink, I like bush.
Patrick 4/4 @ 57
Good call on the year:
WITCH DOCTOR
(Ross Bagdaserian Jr.)
David Seville - 1958
ah Trex - not the kitty - I’ll resend to you direct
Teddy - I am so jealous of your new food extravaganza! in my neighborhood we have a wonderful funny produce place but the local groceries are a disaster - a coop that is falling apart and a shame given the neighborhood … folks trek north to Trader Joe’s and Whole Foods but I love walking to a store and picking out something to cook that night … congrats on your good fortune!
JugOPunch @ 59
Must not reply…
Must not reply…
I know little of curses, but this sure sounds like one working its way up the curso-scale of speed, distance, effectiveness, and danger. Especially with these simultaneous* foreign trips planned WandDarth — that can’t be good planning, can it? Corporations have rules about all the executives not being outta the shop at the same time — shouldn’t our government require someone to be near the SitRoom? Or is it Denny?
* are the W-Jordan and Darth-Saud trips simultaneous? I had that impression earlier….
Petedownunder … thanks for the offer!
JugOPunch @ 59
Funny.
That’s the only time Bush likes Bush, too.
Hey - are you not-Jenna?
;)
kirk murphy @ 65
We are all not-Jenna now.
Patrick 4/4 - I admire your restraint!
and Teddy - I find the simultaneous out-of-country-in-middle-eastern-regions very disturbing … something tells me there will be some sort of Thanksgiving news commotion
petedownunder - I think I replied at 104 on the last thread….
Patrick 4/4 @ 66
talk about panspermia…
Siun @ 67
I won’t be at all surprised, unless it does something significant to Bush’s approvals.
EvilDrPuma @ 70
I didn’t know about the Darth/Saud trip and I still had that “uh-oh” feeling when I found out shrub was going to the ME - somethin’s up…
kirk murphy @ 69
I prefer pan dulce, but okay…
kirk murphy @ 58
Sounds like a plan, I’ll be around there the first three weeks of December then back to Oz for a bright XMas (100 degrees) on the beach.
Siun at 64; Are the travel plans of the Cheney and the Chimp publicized in the US? Seems very odd…I thought the Chimp was in Honolulu on his way back to the US?
Siun @ 61
We have been so deprived, here. I know it sounds silly, but I can afford only to live in this world-class city where the murder rate is highest (WeAdd). Crime sounds occur all night here, we’ve had break-ins, yet I love our apartment, our hometown, and our life here. This blessing — this enhancement — is enabled, I suppose, by the $500,000 studio and 1BR condos atop the Food Palace. It still shocks me. I feel like a kid with a new bike — I’m gonna need to check first thing in the a.m. to be sure it’s still there.
Patrick 4/4 @ 72
ROTFLMAO
Patrick 4/4 @ 72
I prefer pan dulce, but okay…
I’ll stick with pan pizza.
Siun @ 67
I can feel the disturbance coming. Okay, Alcoa me. But I can.
‘course, it’ll be interesting to see how the curse works when jr is in Jordan…
Teddy … nodding … a great food store is one of my favorite pastimes
NZ Expat @
68
You did, sorry I EPU’d myself. 1979 is a long time ago. If you gave a statement or deposition it would be good to know it cold to avoid the embarrassment of a smart ass lawyer saying, “Now NZ Expat back in 1985 you were under oath and said x, and now in 2006 you say y - which time were you lying?”
The lawyer who called you to testify will no doubt brief you better. Good luck.
petedownunder @ 73
Great. My knee may-all kmurphy hat riseup daught
goalnetNot-EPU’d:
Christy Hardin Smith @ 39
For the record, my nomination for our slogan is:
=======
Who’s Next?
=======
NZ Expat … I have not seen regular news about the travels just notes online … but there’s a feel of some sort of commotion.
Kirk - you have mail, I hope.
BigTime to Saudi Arabia Friday:
http://today.reuters.com/news/.....orldNews-1
W to Jordan Wednesday:
http://www.iht.com/articles/20.....s/bush.php
TeddySanFran @ 39
To really make things right, the witch doctor should have then forced a neocon who now thinks the Iraq war was a bad idea to eat that crow.
Siun @ 67,
I’ve been worrying about that too. Wonder if he’s going to go for a long rest somewhere in, oh, South America maybe, and let Dick finish up.
I have a feeling he may actually not be well enough to finish his term.
TeddySanFran @ 86
I think this is laying the groundwork for the ISG report.
The report will say we need a region-wide solution and W gets to say look! I’m already doing it. The bill is going to be staggering.
Good thing the twins weren’t carrying the nook-ular football. Oh, they were? When I heard Dad made a pass at them I assumed they were playing Texas Hold ‘Em…
Thanks petedownunder….I haven’t seen any copy of the 1980 trial and can’t really remember much about that….I have the police report of the incident and a copy of the phone deposition in August. I’ll send a request to the legal assistant that is arranging this to see what else is expected.
Really appreciate the heads up.
Siun, that video is hilarious! Although a little disturbing…
TeddySanFran @ 86
Especially lame-duck presidents whom everybody at home pretty much despises. It would be hilarious to watch Bush spend his last two years drifting unwelcome from country to country like the infamous Philly garbage barge.
it seemed like a trex latenight to Kit
so save it for the right moment!
Nate @
28
TRex, you’re starting to give me a complex. No response to my email and now none for my comment asking about the email.
Don’t make me throw a hissy-fit. I don’t have any experience at it and someone might mistake it for a heart attack or maybe just as some white guy trying to break-dance or something.
Nate @ 95
Sorry, Nate. I have multiple streams of information coming at me at once right now. And no, I didn’t get that email.
EvilDrPuma @ 93
So right. Bush hates the rest of the world as much as they hate him. He’ll become more diplomatic? Like he’s going to be more bipartisan? For 6 years he’s been a major league, petulant asshole. He ain’t changin’. The next 2 years will indeed mark his legacy, which will be: once an asshole, always an asshole…
TRex @ 96
Do you get delusions of grandeur when you have multiple channels of info open too? Or is that just me?
Anyways I re-sent the email to your df# at BS.net address. Take a look when you get a minute.