Oh, good lord. Katherine Harris is rapidly becoming the LaToya "Little Jackson that Couldn’t" Jackson of the Republican party. The Good General kindly (and 100% heterosexually) points us to this article:
ORLANDO, Fla. – Katherine Harris’ attempt to boost her campaign with a series of high-profile endorsements wilted Thursday when none of the officials appeared at her campaign rally and one of them said Harris wrongly included him on her list of supporters.
State Sen. Daniel Webster, R-Winter Garden, said he has not endorsed Harris and instead is supporting one of her challengers, Orlando attorney Will McBride.
Harris, McBride, retired Adm. LeRoy Collins and developer Peter Monroe are battling for the right to take on Democratic Sen. Bill Nelson in the general election.
Webster, a former Florida House speaker and now a state senator, said he’s been with McBride since May, when the candidate jumped into the race.
"I’ve always backed Will," said Webster. "He’ll make a great United States senator."
Webster said he had no idea why Harris listed him as one of her supporters. He said he never endorsed her.
Harris insisted that Webster promised to attend her rally Thursday at Orlando Executive Airport.
"They called back twice and said he’d be here," said Harris. "He said he was going to be here on the stage with me today."
Jesus, Katherine, how many copies of He’s Just Not That Into You am I going to have to send to you this year?
He wasn’t the only no-show for Harris’ "Soaring for the Senate" rally.
None of the nine officials listed on her event flier appeared, leaving Harris on her own to address a group of about 40 supporters, reporters and campaign staff members.
Harris spoke in an airplane hangar that seemed to highlight the modest size of the crowd. She said a last-minute location change – required because a tree fell on the hangar where the event was supposed to be held – kept crowd numbers down.
In other words, it’s the "A Big Black Dog Ate My Campaign" approach to coping with failure.
Airport officials, however, said no hangar had been damaged by a downed tree and that the rally was held in the hangar that had been originally booked.
"She’s truth-challenged," McBride said this week. "She has problems with the truth."
You don’t say. Shut. Up. But she was such a paragon of nonpartisan virtue back in 2000 during the recounts!
But wait, it gets better. This bit made me laugh out loud:
Harris spoke for 10 minutes saying she was the only candidate with the conservative credentials to defeat Nelson. When she finished, red, white and blue balloons dropped onto an empty stage, rendered unnecessary by the sparse crowd. (Emphasis mine.)
That image is so beautiful, it calls for a haiku:
The slow balloons fall
Like cherry blossoms in spring.
Your campaign is toast.
I’ve said it before, and I feel fairly certain I’ll say it again. Karma’s a bitch. And she knows where you live.
I don’t know if you just happened to be running low on your supplies of shame and self-awareness on the day you made Little Katie Harris, or if you simply sent her to Earth for comic relief, but thank you. I think. I don’t know if any amount of public humiliation will ever be able to make up for the role she played in unleashing the Bush administration upon the world, but in the meantime, watching her impale herself on the cruel spike of public indifference this fall may be one of the single greatest pleasures of the political season, so thank you.
In Jesus’ name I pray,
UPDATE: Darkblack weighs in with his usual aplomb: